News from an unexpected pantheon this week, the normally implacable, peaceful Hindu gods have been witnessed in serious training, buffing up and developing new powers for an unknown onslaught against the forces of darkness and/or aging.
According to the Wall Street Journal, dark changes have been witnessed in the Hindu gods of late as this artist’s rendering reflects —>>>
For decades this peaceful pantheon has focused mainly on keeping calm, meditative watch on tourists to India but now it appears this epoch is at an end, as gods like Rama prepare to wage an unknown war.
Of particular concern to god watchers at the Wall Street Journal is the god Rama, who appears to have donned his old armour and resurrected his army of vanaras, or deadly supernatural monkeys and bears.
“I should have known something was going on when Rama replaced his or topknot with those dreadlocks and started training at night with Lord Krishna,” says Sita, Rama’s wife. “But I just thought he was having a midlife crisis. After centuries of smiling for tourists, I figured he just needed a break. You know before we married he lived alone in the forest and fought demons almost every day. ”
Sita thinks he might be training to defeat Ravana the demon king once and for all.
“He never quite forgave Ravana for kidnapping me that time. Rama could be out for his final revenge.”
However many god observers speculate there may be something bigger at play.
“You know something bad is coming when the Hindu gods rise up,” stated renowned supernatural survivologist Dr. Dominicus Von Buren. “Historically they work well with other pantheons of gods and goddesses. I wouldn’t be surprised if this has a global effort of epic proportions.”