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This Week In Surivival

This Week In Survival Jan 25, 2014 Cannibals Convene Everywhere

January 25, 2014 By Seth Leave a Comment

Seems like there was no avoiding the cannibals This Week In Survival. Even if you could spot the clandestine cannibal convention now the cannibals are coming to you.  On a ship. That they sail themselves.

Cannibal rats crew the ship to a shore near you.
Cannibal rats crew the ship to a shore near you.

Yes cannibal rats on the ghost ship Lyubov Orlova are coming soon to a shore near you, releasing its crew of starving cannibal rats —>>

I know, like me you’re probably thinking, ah AHSOME!? Rats who can sail a luxury ocean liner!? Sign me up to sail away. But mainstream media sources have been emphasizing just how hungry these cannibal rats will be when they land ie: very, vErY, VERY hungry.

Now today some say the ship may have sunk but for me the only thing worse than mainstream media telling me to worry about cannibal rats is mainstream media telling me to NOT worry about cannibal rats. Point is, I’m working on my cannibal rat trap now before it’s too late and I hope that you are too. So far here’s my first tip: bait your cannibal rat traps with test cosmetics. It’s not so much that the rats hate cosmetics testing so much as they will LOVE the unwitting cosmetics testing protestors who show up. Sure they’re a little stringy but they can’t run away. And sometimes that’s all you need to survive.

Sorry that’s all I got so far. Now it’s time to see what other survivors are reporting this week and why on the pages of SOS…

SOS Shattered Soul Syndrome 

–>>It was SOTM VALENKO. Where were the shards of his soul and why?  Did Lilith, Fenrir and Chaos find and reassemble the pieces? It appears there was some kind of ritual involved to bring them together… let’s see if I can find those links now…

Of course. Here is one. Very instructive read. Not sure I would trust an admitted soul devourer like LILITH to re-assemble my soul fragments but it seems to have… HOLD ON… now where is the soul exactly????? 

Soul Recovery Service

–>> Feel fragmented? Like a part of you might be missing? Do you suspect it could be your soul? Check out LILITH’s soul recovery service. Results and prices undetermined but her satisfaction seems guaranteed…

Cannibal Cruise Ship
Cannibal Cruise Ship

Black Dragon Gifts

–>> MARNEY a draconian would like to know – and so would I. Will JERRY9012 report?

Pets Wanted

–>> But should you get a hellhound? KUROGANE thinks so but I’m not so sure. Sure he makes them sound colourful and fun but what happens when your hellhound outlives you? Read the Reaperstips to find out more. Just don’t go there expecting gardening tips. He has a bit of a black thumb… hey wait there’s actually a market for that…

Reapers Floral Arrangements

–>> Need some dried dead plants attractively arranged for that special someone or occasion? Contact REAPERS ARRANGEMENTS here…

Can anyone be an angel?
Can anyone be an angel?

Seeking Camp Halfblood

–>> The real one. If any have seen it lately, a survivor DoP is looking here. I understand that it moves around. Why does SCARLETT seem suddenly eager to help find it?

Can You Become An Angel?

<<— This SOS message from The Nubiness. Angels are not the recruity-est of beings but can you become one?. I mean they don’t go around biting like vampires or werewolves. However, I have met a few demons and vampires who claim to have become angels so clearly something happened.  Also I recall a cherub on the site for a while who claimed that if he could make a certain number of couples fall in love by valentine’s day then he got to be an angel. But was he telling the truth?  It’s a good question with Valentine’s Day on the way…

Classic Muffin Trap

–>> Reported by the REAPER who is springing them all but look who is behind it… Trolls vs Werewolves? Are they trying to harness werewolves for transportation again?

Totally Missed It: 

–>> SYREIGN a mermaid, hit by a stray silver bullet intended for a werewolf, survived. What did she learn about the intended target?

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Filed Under: Survival News Tagged With: Cannibals, This Week In Surivival

This Week In Survival Jan 11, 2014

January 11, 2014 By Seth 1 Comment

Except for the global Time Traveler Twitter Test and an unexpected Cannibal Convention it was cold quiet one week here at SOS and around the globe.

Thanks to the Hatter for this HEADS up...
Thanks to the Hatter for this HEADS up…

That’s right, Cannibal Convention –>>

This gristly news from the HATTER, still coming in. Preliminary info shows it taking place in Colorado.

So hang onto you hat – and your head – while I try and get the scoop on that and more for This Week In Survival.

Keep on keeping on while I post the summaries and links below.

This blog post in progress over the next 33 hours….

Is it just me or do all these shrink-wrapped face-steaks look like the same face to you? Are cannibals cloning a source of white meat? If so, who is – or was  – this?  And why are they all a different price? Anyone noted the existence of a clone farm in Colorado? What if you see your face on a Cannibal grocery story shelf?

Poltergeist Problems

–>> Does MATHEW MEGA have a Class D Doorbell/Phone Ringer phantom? Will he choose the cherry pie? Or record the results and play them back? Keep on for that update…

Hats Off

–>> Did LILITH every get her hat? If so did it work? What did she want it for anyway?

Wish The Dark Had Taken You?

–>> See FENRIR’s latest update from the cold front of an epic winter war HERE.  What’s his plan now?

WANTED: Sword of Light

–>> Hmm wasn’t this one found last week? ANDRE wants to know. I’m checking that now… If I recall correctly ICE has it currently…

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This Week In Survival, Dec 28 2013

December 28, 2013 By Seth 19 Comments

Another Supernatural Week Of Survival.
Another Supernatural Week Of Survival.

This Week In Survival around the globe and on the site survivors have been working to restore and keep the light long enough to avoid the declaration of a Dark Year…

Check here over the next 36 hours or so as I scroll back through the pages. I hope you’ll follow the colored links and help me figure it out.

This Week In Survival and my midnight mac and cheese both brought to you by Power Pot this week.

Was It That Tempest on the plain of Lir? 

What is the the reason for this Dark Christmas season? Is it…

–>>  FENRIR finally or still or again breaking out of his chains?  Or is this just a symptom? On the bright side of the dark side, Fenrir claims he would fight for good.

–>> Or something to do with a certain LILITH’s arrival? What happens if she teams up with Fenrir? Would that be good or bad?

–>> Or is it the faeries? Could there be a epic seasonal battle without a faerie army? TITANIA has words with both FENRIR and LILITH.  Seems like there’s some bad blood here. On the plus side, there could be an epic afterparty. Want an invite? Follow the link if you dare…

–>>And did anyone ever get ZERETH a supernatural sandwich? If so, was it really a sandwich? (See below, Velanko’s note on supernatural relics, correct identification thereof.)

National Necromancy Day? 

–>> Why didn’t my calendar alert me? KENJI swears it’s true.  Learn all about it before it’s too late. Good thing he found an original Hatter hat. Oh wait a minute… maybe not quite so good.

WANTED: One Æsahættr Bearer

–>> Who wants to know?  SCARLETT  looking for a particular one.  Did she find it?

–>> What’s a Æsahættr you ask? Or maybe you already know. Either way, you can read Scarlett’s description here but I couldn’t find a reliable photo so maybe it is unphotographable or in the form of a sandwich or something.  HEY!  Maybe that’s what Zereth is really looking for…

(Many thanks to Fenrir & Velanko for getting to the bottom of  that one.)

WANTED: 12 Great Relics

–>> Before you answer NO ask yourself this, could you identify a Great Relic? You might want to read this note from VELANKO here and re-examine ALL the objects in your life.

–>> Who wants to know? Er nevermind, it’s FENRIR, so I’m not sure we should be helping at this point, at least until the light is restored and the threat of a Dark Year dismissed. However if you are currently in possession of or know the whereabouts of one or more of these relics you may wish to consider securing them.

–>> Looks like ICE has one of them. How did he get that? And what does he plan to do with it? Should he really be advertising it here?

–>> REAPER knows the location of another one. What dragon is he referring to? Does anyone else smell a setup here?

MISSING IN ACTION: DarkOne’s Brother

–>> Was it pinkeye or lycanthropy? Is it possible he was called to transform now for a reason? Any werewolves who spot him please let Dark One Know.

MISSING IN ACTION: Hatter’s Cousin

–>> Any time travellers in the house are asked to join the search for HATTER’s cousin who appears to be trapped in a time eddy. I hope it’s a warm one because without electricity I doubt we can get him back…

A Real Live Human… Or Not? 

–>> It’s extremely rare to hear of anyone receiving a definitive human diagnosis from The Monstrometer but WEBWOLF claims to done just that. So how does he account for this bit of super weirdness?

–>> …to be continued.

 

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This Week In Survival December 14

December 14, 2013 By Seth 26 Comments

Another Supernatural Week Of Survival!
Another Supernatural Week Of Survival!

You feeling the weight of the universe today?

Well if it’s not the holiday parties, blame it on those scientists from Denmark who declared Friday December 13th, 2013 as the Day The Universe Could Collapse And Make Everything Suddenly Much, Much Heavier – but didn’t. But could have done! And still might. Any day now, they say. I’m not making this up, you can read about that here.  

So on my To Do list today – How To Survive the Universe Collapsing and Suddenly Becoming Much, Much Heavier. But because it’s the weekend, Number One of course is checking on the site to see who’s surviving around here and how and why This Week In Survival, with somewhat helpful links that I hope you will follow and join in.

Thanks to everyone for surviving with me, helping keep SOS going against the supernatural and super natural odds.*

Can You Spot an Area 51 Agent?

Thanks to the Hatter for sending in this report.
Thanks to the Hatter for sending in this report.

–>> From the depths of my overstuffed email, an overlooked report from the HATTER, who snapped this excellent photo on the last full moon.

–>> Is it an Area 51 agent? Or something more sinister, like URBAN SQUATCH with a demonic delivery he doesn’t want to make?  How did that end anyway? It didn’t really look good for him this time.

And I thought pizza was a tough gig…

Until we have all the facts, Survivors are advised to watch out for, please read Hatter’s ongoing coverage and report any suspicious white vans or other surveillance activity that may be occurring in the neighbourhood.

–>> What should you do if you are being surveilled by Area 51? Best answer to be linked here…

What If Your Fortune Cookie Looks Like This?

Cautious thank you to the Reaper for this warning.  I think.
Cautious thank you to the Reaper for this warning. I think.

–>> Another reminder from the HATTER this week to survivors if your fortune cookie looks like this, you may need some advice and assistance.  But is this a new technique the REAPER  himself is trying out? Or just a sort-of a friendly warning that REAPER is now sending you to help you survive? That part is not so clear. If you or anyone you know has received a fortune like this, please weigh in.

–>> Survivor MATHEWMEGA1 says he received one such ominous warning in a regular chocolate chip cookie.  Details about this are still coming in, where he got the cookie and when.

–>> Uh oh. Clarification here form  old REAPER himself, who appears to have gone very  GRIM… He has kindly taken time away from his battle with a new demon, to clarify the difference between a message in a fortune cookie vs a message a chocolate chip cookie.  Is this his way of hogging all the chocolate chip cookies in the world? whatever the case, this doesn’t look good for MM…

How To Annoy a Werewolf: 

–>> This needs no explanation.  Please don’t do this on SOS.  Do we need a Hall of Famer smackdown? I think not. Very anti-survival. I hate having to roll back the survivor counter. But I will do it,  for the sake of history. Looks like a few survivors could cool off with a little ICE. 

Thanks to you Sir for promoting valuable survival traits like common courtesy on the site. Nobody has ever been booted from SOS for revealing their inner monster, but I reserve the right to moderate behaviour that is not conducive to survival, yours or mine.

All I Want For Christmas 

–>> Looking for that dream gift? But don’t trust Amazon or Urban Squatch to deliver it on time? Why not order somebody a good dream? I’m looking into that. Will SCARLETT deliver? But if so, what will be the price?

Hell Knight

More Holiday Horror 

–>> Did THE REAPER discover Krampus has an accomplice? Makes sense. How else would he hunt down all the Naughty Listers. I mean, could he really get them all himself in one night? See for yourself. On the bright side ICE came back to help him.  

More on this in progress…

 

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This Week In Survival – November 09, 2013

November 9, 2013 By Seth 19 Comments

Another Supernatural Week Of Survival!
Another Supernatural Week Of Survival!

Got gleipnir anyone? Cause it just might come in handy this week in survival.

If you did happen to survive this week, with its demons of unknown origin snatching up snoggers and mermonsters looking for bones to sculpt, check back here where I will attempt to summarize, eulogize and/or wisely otherwise-ize whoever’s still keeping on keeping on out there with colorful links you can follow and comment on yourself…

 

 

Breaking News

–>> NEW BLOUD sent this ominous warning and photo. What does it mean? Listen here and help figure it out before its too late…

http://sethonsurvival.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/SethLog1-Processed.mp3
New Bloud disappeared shortly after seeing the so-called Slender Man.
New Bloud disappeared shortly after seeing the so-called Slender Man.

Pick Your Demon Survival Stratey:

With a hug-hating demon on the lose, should you:

1. Get out your Enochian symbols (REAPER’s THEORY.)

2. Avoid making out in Nematon Groves and chopping down trees? (FENRIR’S THEORY) or

3. Business as usual! This demon can’t hurt you. (ADISA’S THEORY)

Please follow the links and weigh in.

Any Packs Recruiting? 

–>> WW seeks the right pack. DARK ONE also wants to know how can she trust that I’m not with Area 51. Unbelievable…  

** Also if you really believe that I might be with Area 51, please don’t give your personal email or location info here on the site. Please no hints hints about your real name or location. 

Do Sparkles Make You Maaaad? 

–>> They do me. Here’s why. And finally for the record, my reply. Hate when I overlook ones like this.

Anyone Missing a Zombie? 

–>> HATTER claims to have found a zombie named Anson – how was he able to confirm his name again? – anyway point is if you are missing a zombie friend or ahem pet, you might want to have a word with the site’s self-proclaimed monster therapist. 

(Also get ready to hear from ZYBORAGON because he generally doesn’t stand for that kind of zombie abuse.)

Poison Nightshade?

–>> Has NIGHTSHADE been poisoned? Or poisoned by him? Will SCARLETT re-find the REPLY button again in time to figure this out?

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