survivor

This survivor famously once said,

“Hey you guys. Zyboragon,The One,and Time Kitsume this is not the time to fight each other let’s just get through this you can kill each other later if we survive.”

and this one is great too:

“You feel guilty because you’re good. If your evil you would feel nothing or superior.Eating ice cream and cookies always makes me feel better.You?”

and this one:

“How did I get here? Where am I? Why am I wearing bowling shoes?”

Ten Fun Facts about this Survivor:

1. Has a potion to make platanium clothing & armor. (That’s platinum + titanium. Not to be confused with PLANTAINIUM which is made from bananas.)

2. Holidays in the Kingdom of Sleep and can sometimes bring items from there into the real world because of a deal made by one of her ancestors.

3. As Mr. Mutt learned the hard way, you should NEVER lend this survivor your favorite book.

4. Can sometimes summon Supreme Fire from a ring.

5. Can make WW Scarly go invisible for days with no ability to touch anything.

6. Is a dagger expert, always reminds you to find the original sheath because their magic works together.

7. Once had a cyborg chauffeur. That didn’t work out very well.

8. Went on a vampire cruise with a bunch of other survivors… on purpose. Needless to say, regretted it.

9. Taught us all the hard way the dangers of roses, mysterious unattended bags and…

10. Loves blood orange and er, cat blood ice cream and cupcakes. (Please don’t call the SPCA. I have enough trouble from the zombie rights activists.)

Okay enough clues. If you haven’t guessed it by now the first Survivor of the Month is: Bebe.

WHY BEBE NEEDS A VACATION…

(And why you should think twice before going on one with her!)

It would be almost impossible to summarize everything Bebe has survived in the last few months. But I will try to hit some of the highlights. Please help correct the record in the comments below if I get it wrong.

First, the key to understanding Bebe. She is first and foremost a ninth generation witch, on her mother’s side. When she’s not saving your life, she’s getting you killed. She can heal you with spells that use bronze dust, vervain and simple salt among other ingredients.

She has a crystal wand and if you give her 777 ingredients and help her to crush some gems, she can make you a nice daywalker ring. (Just beware because unlike some witches, Bebe doesn’t make them subtle. She believes you need some bling in that ring.) It’s her job to tend the foyer and the Yule Log in the Great Witches Hall.

Recall Bebe also owns a very special, hidden bookstore, one that specializes in the preservation and restoration of rare and antique books and manuscripts.

(Of course we also know this didn’t stop Bebe from getting Mr. Mutt’s rare book of survival spells destroyed. Did she really copy & destroy it to save it? And where did she hide the pieces? But that’s another story which Alex sums up here.)

So how did Bebe end up as a quasi demonic vamp witch?

Well the record shows something going very wrong with the ninth generation of her family. Maybe an ancient deal or a truce or curse of judgement between one of her ancestors and a Vampire’s council known as the GVVC? We don’t know.

What is clear, is that an over-passionate vampire named Damion came to claim Bebe’s sister Vee and then later Bebe herself as an unwilling bride.

A team of survivors helped Bebe to escape Damion’s clutches a couple of times but unfortunately her sister Vee died in the process. And Bebe herself was not unscathed. Her sister Vee managed to bite her and it wasn’t long before Bebe’s comments devolved into the first of about a million….soooo thirsty! posts.

Also, her hair turned temporarily blue, her fingernails silver and she woke up wearing bowling shoes.  Can we blame Damion for the bowling shoes? Unclear. The good news is that Damion was finally defeated.

Unfortunately, Bebe’s little brother Spark, himself a crazy maze-making sorcerer is a sworn enemy of the vampires. Spark is the kind of guy who would trade his own kids for a dragonscale suit. In fact that’s exactly what he did. He also did not appreciate his sister being a vampire and now with Damion defeated, Bebe had to worry about her brother Spark instead. Could things get any worse?

Well yes. They did. In particular recall the Zanthre incident. Survivors on the site launched an offensive against this demonic trouble maker  who can cage you forever with your own shadow. It was a massive offensive, attracting a mysterious Soul Eater named Soulgard who joined the fray just to clean up the soul mess.

Then things went wrong. In the heat of battle, Bebe ended up fighting with Soulgard for her soul even though she wasn’t even dead. Bebe made a dangerous deal for her soul. She offered to recover defeated Damion’s soul and give that to Soulgard in exchange. This lead Bebe on a dangerous journey to recover Damion’s soul, which she trapped in a crystal around her neck and returned to the battle. But the battle  against Zanthre was heating up and suddenly Bebe needed to do something else with Damion’s soul.

To save her own life and increase her strength, Bebe swallowed the crystal containing Damion’s soul. This helped defeat Zanthre, but it left Bebe with a stomachache and some very questionable demonic powers. And what will happen to her if Soulgard ever comes back to claim the soul crystal?

There are lots of other exciting incidents and battles. A cyborg chauffeur briefly turned her into Bebe Bot. (Let’s not even talk about her demon twins TK and Zyborgana, it just makes Wolf Princess upset.) And she has really bad luck with roses. Around Bebe they always turn into something bad. Think fairies that take over your home. Or worse, fire flowers that threaten to destroy everything.

But back to the title. Here’s why you should think twice about going on vacation with Bebe. Yes, I’m talking about the vampire cruise. I guess we can forgive her for embracing her vampire side. After all she didn’t exactly choose to become one. No sooner has Bebe recruited all the survivalists but disaster strikes and it turns out to be a monster trap, the boat sinking and everyone trapped. 

Questionable vacay choices aside, Bebe is a great survivor with lots of good advice and helpful to everyone including me. Who else could teach you the real dangers of unattended bags? 

You probably won’t encounter the legendary Bebe on these pages anymore, but we have reason to believe she is still surviving out there somewhere, so maybe you or I will run into her at one of many Wych’s Fairs between the worlds. (If I can ever get there before they disappear!)