News from the ancient city of Coventry, Great Britain. At 6:45 pm on Monday, a storm of apples pelted the village of Coundon, turning roads – and possibly hearts – to fruity mush.
“The apples fell out of nowhere. They were small and green and hit the bonnet hard. Everyone had to stop their cars suddenly,” said one motorist traveling with her husband.
Even more mysterious, at the time the apples fell from the sky, it was pretty calm over Coventry, according to the BBC Weather Centre. The Met Office says there were no reports of tornadoes in the area, leading many to suspect the activity of witches or demons.
But aren’t beans the magical fruit? To find the core truth here, I asked Romanian White Witch Maria Campesina, a reluctant if semi-frequent contributer to SOS.
“Beans aren’t even a fruit,” writes Maria. “Apples have been the preferred fruit of enchanters, angels, faeries and demons since Adam and Eve. They are the fruit of heaven, longevity, love and immortality. Apples are used for love charms, for knowledge and for spells to reveal lovers. They are also a great source of fiber, although not as good as beans.”
But if this is a dramatic love charm gone awry, who is responsible? And who the intended target?
It’s too soon to prove conclusively, but early media reports seem to indicate the Meakins brothers, either Brian or Dave or possibly both, may have been the target of this fantastical fruiting. Normally a couple of curmudgeons, neighbors say the formerly mean old Meakin men have become surprisingly communicative and friendly ever since the fruit fell on them.
Consider this. Brian Meakins, 63, a forklift driver told everyone around that he was “stunned” when he opened his front door and found his garden full of smashed apples. “At first I assumed those rotten kids must have thrown them because we do get the occasional egg and apple thrown and normally I would hunt them all down and tan their hides but not this time. For some reason this time, I’m okay with it.”
Immediately following the attack, brother Dave Meakins who always kind of wanted to wear a gold earring in his left ear as an expression of his easy-going and open-minded nature but was afraid of what people would say, finally went out and got his ear pierced.
“I chose a gold hoop, you know, circle of life shape. What do you think?”
No witches have claimed credit yet but the neighborhood kids have expressed relief that grumpy old Mr. Meany-kins will finally have somebody else to chase after.