Breaking Survival News: World Not Ending Dec 21, 2012 – Some Assembly May Be Required

For survivors who maybe forgot to set an alert, a quick update – there’s a thing where the Mayan calendar is about to run out, without which there allegedly can be no more time. Hence the end of the world business. Now being that my survival depends on your survival and that your and my survival depends on the continued existence of the world this seemed like a pretty big deal to me so as many of you already know, I set about finding a way to stop this from happening.

I am happy to announce that after weeks of research and consulting with reluctant Mayan Daykeeper Professor Leonzo Barreno I have the solution! Even though technically it turns out there never was a problem. But since when is that a good reason to stop looking for a solution? Any really good solution will make its own problem. No problem! As it turns out, our Mayan friends have provided us with a way that we can all survive and contribute to the cyclical renewal of time. MORE MAYAN CALENDAR!!  So simple. We just have to flip the page so to speak from the 12th baktun cycle to the 13th baktun cycle, before or after performing whatever seasonal observance or ceremony your tradition prescribes.

Here is a small sample of that Calendar, just enough to flip over from December 20 to December 21 and get us over that little end of the world speed bump:

The last big stone calendar that the Mayans had made way back in the day went up to December 20, 2012 but they actually have a system whereby we can keep just constructing additional calendars kind of like the way we do each year except they make us look lazy in comparison because while we only bother to make 365 days at a time their calendars last hundreds of years.

So it turns out that the world actually won’t end until October 13, 4772 when the Mayan calendar really finally runs out (that’s the day that we run out of Baktun!). Now that is a long time away for us humans but for some of our immortal or long-lived brethren here on the site that is really pretty close so I suggest you start planning. You have less than 2760 years left to get your affairs in order.

So the world won’t end on December 21, 2012 but you do have to help out to make sure that it doesn’t suffer significant calamity as a result of there being wide-spread panic, chaos, looting, rioting and general weirdness on Friday due to everyone thinking that the world is about to end.

So to that end please use all available methods including Facebook, twitter and email and even talking to share this picture and let everyone know that everything will be okay and that we don’t have to start worrying about this again until 2759 years from now. Until then heed Professor Daykeeper’s words and keep the light of hope alive in this darkest time of year, in whatever tradition you choose.

So keep on keeping on and happy 13 baktun 0 katun 0 tun 0 winal 0 kin 4 Ajaw 3 K’ank’in to you and yours.

Somewhat Related Articles:

*Last Living Daykeeper to Humanity – Leave Me Alone!

*The Yule Cat Cometh! Are You Preparethed? 

*Deck The Tree with Boughs of Bacon  – IF YOU WANT TO LIVE! Darkest Dark Night Decorating