Disturbing reports from Vancouver, Canada this week, a mysterious attacker terrorizes bathroom patron at a popular discount store.
Police in Abbotsford, BC report a mysterious bite attack on a seven year-old boy in a Costco washroom.
According to Cst. Ian MacDonald, a 10-year-old boy allegedly crawled under the partition of a locked bathroom stall and bit a seven-year-old boy who was minding his own business within around noon on Saturday.
Police are asking the public for help identifying the suspected child vampire, who is described as approximately 10 years-old with dark hair and dark clothing and possibly a camouflage sweater.
Meanwhile Supernatural Surviviologist Seth Greening, totally NOT interviewing himself to make this article seem more official, is working with the family of the seven year old boy to treat the suspicious bite and hopefully prevent an unwelcome transformation.
But the question remains, what was a vampire doing at Costco? Vampires as we all know are better known for their exquisite taste in just about everything. Most of them would not be caught undead patrolling a Costco bathroom which are better known for the possible presence of zombies.
“Remember this was a suspected child vampire,” says Seth wisely. “This is why most responsible vampire covens have a very restricted recruitment policy. If I could get my hands on the irresponsible biter who engendered this wild young vampire I would…” (Seth urges readers to fill in the dots here with any scenario that doesn’t include getting the life sucked out of me, er him.)
Or maybe it wasn’t a vampire at all. Maybe it was something else…?
by Seth Greening - Visit SethOnSurvival.com
Sounds like Joseph
The little geek
Is a bit of a freak
But the description fits.
And
“Remember this was a suspected child vampire,” says Seth wisely. “This is why most responsible vampire covens have a very restricted recruitment policy. If I could get my hands on the irresponsible biter who engendered this wild young vampire I would call on my monster friends to neutralize him.”
Neutralization order received, shall ARC commence forward?
Wait what your listening to me?
Now I can l can laugh with glee!
ARC was making a funny.
Could be a hybrid. My army disintegrated into various covens, packs, and clans. (sigh)
ARC ate tons of dynamite, ARC does not feel good. ARC hopes he doesn’t explo
That’s a spicy meataball!!!!!
You can’t use that here, you can’t compete with movies starring the greatest cyborg actor Jim Carry! He’s the most famous cyborg since that guy who made all those sound effects in the police academy movies. His name should not be mentioned.
No but I can try. Besides more actors are vamps then cyborgs.
Mutt out
Which is precisely why we cyborgs hold our stars in such high regard. But ARC has been wondering how Betty White still walks among us, thanks for the closure.
Still ARC feels kind of insulted. When your a cyborg, a movie such as The Mask has much more meaning to it.
Also ARC is still cracking up about ARCs signal pickups, ARC find it hilarious to have fond “Luke there is another Skynet” ARC can rest easy knowing that TermiVader is watching over the dark side of the machines! Hahaha! ARC loves it!
Bill Murray. Funniest human ever.
Dam right!
Hail ARC,
Thanks for keeping on. Here’s hoping the dynamite settles…
I’m intrigued by your theory re: Jim Carrey a cyborg. What evidence have you seen? His Santa Monica Cyborg Society card?
Seth
Jim Carrey? I bet he IS a cyborg! Who else could make those crazy sounds he makes without special programming.
Also, I’m pretty sure that if HE is one, we should be looking into other comedians as well.
Thoughts?
Hey I did some poking around and found the group that did this it is a bunch of hybrids with a vampire leader I doubt that this will be the last we hear from them
Oh and if you got any time on your hand you might want to know they got me and I’m the leaders next snack so you might want t…. To late.
Ofilia HELP HIM!! Yes you get over there!! She just left she should be appearing now.
Tell her I’m the one with the Bluetooth (it reads my mind and imputs what I want on here) oh I guess she could look for the guy getting his blood sucked outa him.
Guess who’s iPhone I just stole! Have a stake! Hybrids STAND DOWN I am Ofilia Blackwolf third in command under our Original! Stand Down or perish!
Mm ophilia I never realized what a pretty neck you have mm I could just eat it up in fact…
No lemme back I want my body… Oh but it looks so good.
Come near me I bite. You know what that does to vamps don’t you? And it’s PAINFUL.
Sorry I can’t help it… Ooooooooowwwww…
I just remembered something important… I am wearing a cross!
Hehehe |diot. Great now I’ve got to compell some human so you can make a full transition. Just what I wanted to do 🙄 Lets get you out of here vampy
Thank you mm your neck still looks delicious by the by
Oo look at her yum.
What’s with this vamp? D¡e!!!!!
That’s enough vamp boy. We don’t kll. Just swab the wound there she’ll be fine.
Mmm thank you.