Archives for November 2013

Ah to tell or not to tell and if to tell, how?  Self-denial is a supernatural force to be sure, how do you break through it safely? Think about it. Was that really a werewolf disguised as grandma – or was everybody just too scared to tell the old lady about what long, pointy teeth she really had until it was way too late?

We get a lot of email here at SOS.  This is, after all the fourth or maybe even the fifth most popular site on the Interwebs for supernatural survivologists like you and me, depending on the time of day.

(And of course, many survivors – you know who you are – continue to send in reports from their ongoing research which is much appreciated and featured as content on the site whenever possible.)

I appreciate all of the correspondence and I try to respond to as many emails as I can personally but sometimes an email is very instructive for everyone, like this one from… let’s call him Mr. Smith —>>>

This, Mr. Smith, is exactly the reason why Graham and I invented The Monstrometer in the first place. Because telling a friend he’s a werewolf – or a vampire or a ghost – is somewhat more complicated than informing him of the s-ball in his left nostril. If the little girl in the red hood had stopped to download The Monstrometer and scanned her grandmother, a village might have been saved.

That said, how do you share Monstrometer results with a subject who remains in stubborn denial of their supernatural self?

I’ll put up three and add to it as survivors contribute… with all due credit, of course.

8 Ways To Tell Your Friend He’s a Werewolf without Him Freaking Out

1. Send your friend an email. You could send him one either:

a) Directly from The Monstrometer but if you don’t want him to know it comes from you, Mr. Smith then

b)  I can send it from my account. Maybe something simple like:

“You have just been scanned by concerned friend who wants you to know that you are in fact actually a werewolf.”

2.  Ask a certified Monster Therapist like The Hatter to stop by and stage a Monster Intervention.

Does he perform this service? Apparently, yes! Contact him by leaving a REPLY here to negotiate a rate.

*Just please ignore everything else that he says about me. I would never decapitate a suspected werewolf.

3. A tried and true method proposed by The Reaper – make him mad and see if he transforms. New werewolves can’t control the were-rage and will transform every time.

*Note this one is only effective if the subject has already experienced their first moon and remains in denial of it every happening.

4. Hire a mariachi band to sing the results to your friend between classes.

5. Drop hints to test his level of lycanthropy and watch him react, for instance show him photos of the moon, or play a wolf’s howl, hopefully this leads to a discussion. –>> Moonsong

6.. Just take your friend out on the full moon and help him through his first transformation. Hopefully you are an experienced enough werewolf to time your own transformation to happen immediately following his – and after you take those photos for later proof. –>>Moonsong

7.. Take him somewhere quiet and private then just break the news. Yelling is unavoidable, however so be prepared. –>> Fenri

8. Don’t beat around the bush. Just let them have it and at least you did your part trying to help them. –>> Scarlett

Thanks to everyone who contributed to this very informative list. Which will prove the most effective? Keep on keeping on to find out.