MALLOCALYPSE BFZ SURVIVAL TIPS
Batten the hatches Survivors, it’s Black Friday. Are you ready for the Mallies?
If not, it’s not too late… yet. But it will be soon so don’t delay. Review these seasonal BFZ survival tips today! Your Black Friday survival is virtually guaranteed, 99.98%*.
Black Friday Zombies
Know The Mally
Often referred to as a BFZ […]
Air force approves zombie pilots for flight using controversial zombie cure
Meet the military force expanding its ranks using a controversial zombie treatment technology known as trans-cranial direct current stimulation (tDCS) and the groaners on both sides.
Even if you’re not a zombie (yet!) you’ve probably heard about this controversial “zombie cure.”
Zombie zappers Experiments with tDCS
Maybe you’ve even used a zombie zapper […]
TOP 3 BFZ SURVIVAL TIPS
Batten the hatches Survivors, it’s Black Friday. Are you ready for the Mallocalypse?
If you haven’t barricaded yourself in the basement with some leftover bird, take a minute to review your Black Friday Zombie (BFZ) survival skills. Remember these three tips today and in the seasonal shopping crush to come survivors, […]
Are you hoping to survival the seasonal onslaught of zombies, and zombie hunters this Halloween by escaping to a fortified remote cabin?
If so then you, like me, have probably been saving up for materials to build your own. But if you, unlike me, happen to have more than $86.55 in spare change owing in part to riot gear repairs and […]
Another zompire grave discovered in Poland by a vampire archaeologist this week proves Poland was zompire ground zero, even while raising the possibility of a fresh zompire outbreak in that country.
SOS warning, the information contained in this report may be disturbing to both vampires and zombies. Read on at your discretion. And please remember, I’m just the […]
Zombies and grizzly bears of the west coast celebrate a major accessibility victory in Vancouver, Canada as a new design law banning doorknobs takes effect in that city, putting an end to old-fashioned turny knobs in favour of easy push-type lever handles.
Zombies celebrate accessibility victory.
“Finally an end to the debilitating dexterity-ism that me and […]
New zombie apocalypse cookbook this week says it wants to remind you that just because you’re grilling a squirrel doesn’t mean you should forget about flavour and keep a giant pizza peel handy in case you need an improvised weapon. But is this shambling so-called chef and her gooey grill really making the best […]
A lunch-making mom in England was horrified to discover brains in her tomato sauce this week.
Are there brains in your tomato sauce?
Horrified mom Julleen Marter – who is neither a zombie nor a cannibal (yet) – was making lunch for her three kids – none of whom are zombies or cannibals either (yet) – […]
With school officially back, hopefully your educational institution of choice has been Zombie Safe Certified by now with certified electric fences and fields, emergency katanas and an up-to-local-municipal-building-codes moat. (Yes MOATS! They’re not just for keeps and holdfasts anymore!)
High-functioning zombies: you may have met one!
But did you know not all the undead you meet at school […]
Are you heading back to school today, concerned about the prospect of being trapped in the cafeteria facing a zombie horde, armed only with a stale croissant to use as a throwing star? Not to mention a gruelling timetable that makes virtually everyone around you look exactly like a shambling zombie at 8:00 am?
SOS Report: […]