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Meet Bebe – Survivor of the Month

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This survivor famously once said,

“Hey you guys. Zyboragon,The One,and Time Kitsume this is not the time to fight each other let’s just get through this you can kill each other later if we survive.”

and this one is great too:

“You feel guilty because you’re good. If your evil you would feel nothing or superior.Eating ice cream and cookies always makes me feel better.You?”

and this one:

“How did I get here? Where am I? Why am I wearing bowling shoes?”

Ten Fun Facts about this Survivor:

1. Has a potion to make platanium clothing & armor. (That’s platinum + titanium. Not to be confused with PLANTAINIUM which is made from bananas.)

2. Holidays in the Kingdom of Sleep and can sometimes bring items from there into the real world because of a deal made by one of her ancestors.

3. As Mr. Mutt learned the hard way, you should NEVER lend this survivor your favorite book.

4. Can sometimes summon Supreme Fire from a ring.

5. Can make WW Scarly go invisible for days with no ability to touch anything.

6. Is a dagger expert, always reminds you to find the original sheath because their magic works together.

7. Once had a cyborg chauffeur. That didn’t work out very well.

8. Went on a vampire cruise with a bunch of other survivors… on purpose. Needless to say, regretted it.

9. Taught us all the hard way the dangers of roses, mysterious unattended bags and…

10. Loves blood orange and er, cat blood ice cream and cupcakes. (Please don’t call the SPCA. I have enough trouble from the zombie rights activists.)

Okay enough clues. If you haven’t guessed it by now the first Survivor of the Month is: Bebe.

WHY BEBE NEEDS A VACATION…

(And why you should think twice before going on one with her!)

It would be almost impossible to summarize everything Bebe has survived in the last few months. But I will try to hit some of the highlights. Please help correct the record in the comments below if I get it wrong.

First, the key to understanding Bebe. She is first and foremost a ninth generation witch, on her mother’s side. When she’s not saving your life, she’s getting you killed. She can heal you with spells that use bronze dust, vervain and simple salt among other ingredients.

She has a crystal wand and if you give her 777 ingredients and help her to crush some gems, she can make you a nice daywalker ring. (Just beware because unlike some witches, Bebe doesn’t make them subtle. She believes you need some bling in that ring.) It’s her job to tend the foyer and the Yule Log in the Great Witches Hall.

Recall Bebe also owns a very special, hidden bookstore, one that specializes in the preservation and restoration of rare and antique books and manuscripts.

(Of course we also know this didn’t stop Bebe from getting Mr. Mutt’s rare book of survival spells destroyed. Did she really copy & destroy it to save it? And where did she hide the pieces? But that’s another story which Alex sums up here.)

So how did Bebe end up as a quasi demonic vamp witch?

Well the record shows something going very wrong with the ninth generation of her family. Maybe an ancient deal or a truce or curse of judgement between one of her ancestors and a Vampire’s council known as the GVVC? We don’t know.

What is clear, is that an over-passionate vampire named Damion came to claim Bebe’s sister Vee and then later Bebe herself as an unwilling bride.

A team of survivors helped Bebe to escape Damion’s clutches a couple of times but unfortunately her sister Vee died in the process. And Bebe herself was not unscathed. Her sister Vee managed to bite her and it wasn’t long before Bebe’s comments devolved into the first of about a million….soooo thirsty! posts.

Also, her hair turned temporarily blue, her fingernails silver and she woke up wearing bowling shoes.  Can we blame Damion for the bowling shoes? Unclear. The good news is that Damion was finally defeated.

Unfortunately, Bebe’s little brother Spark, himself a crazy maze-making sorcerer is a sworn enemy of the vampires. Spark is the kind of guy who would trade his own kids for a dragonscale suit. In fact that’s exactly what he did. He also did not appreciate his sister being a vampire and now with Damion defeated, Bebe had to worry about her brother Spark instead. Could things get any worse?

Well yes. They did. In particular recall the Zanthre incident. Survivors on the site launched an offensive against this demonic trouble maker  who can cage you forever with your own shadow. It was a massive offensive, attracting a mysterious Soul Eater named Soulgard who joined the fray just to clean up the soul mess.

Then things went wrong. In the heat of battle, Bebe ended up fighting with Soulgard for her soul even though she wasn’t even dead. Bebe made a dangerous deal for her soul. She offered to recover defeated Damion’s soul and give that to Soulgard in exchange. This lead Bebe on a dangerous journey to recover Damion’s soul, which she trapped in a crystal around her neck and returned to the battle. But the battle  against Zanthre was heating up and suddenly Bebe needed to do something else with Damion’s soul.

To save her own life and increase her strength, Bebe swallowed the crystal containing Damion’s soul. This helped defeat Zanthre, but it left Bebe with a stomachache and some very questionable demonic powers. And what will happen to her if Soulgard ever comes back to claim the soul crystal?

There are lots of other exciting incidents and battles. A cyborg chauffeur briefly turned her into Bebe Bot. (Let’s not even talk about her demon twins TK and Zyborgana, it just makes Wolf Princess upset.) And she has really bad luck with roses. Around Bebe they always turn into something bad. Think fairies that take over your home. Or worse, fire flowers that threaten to destroy everything.

But back to the title. Here’s why you should think twice about going on vacation with Bebe. Yes, I’m talking about the vampire cruise. I guess we can forgive her for embracing her vampire side. After all she didn’t exactly choose to become one. No sooner has Bebe recruited all the survivalists but disaster strikes and it turns out to be a monster trap, the boat sinking and everyone trapped. 

Questionable vacay choices aside, Bebe is a great survivor with lots of good advice and helpful to everyone including me. Who else could teach you the real dangers of unattended bags? 

You probably won’t encounter the legendary Bebe on these pages anymore, but we have reason to believe she is still surviving out there somewhere, so maybe you or I will run into her at one of many Wych’s Fairs between the worlds. (If I can ever get there before they disappear!)

Meet Mr. Mutt, Survivor of the Month

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“Okay Vampires aren’t all that bad. I’m not going to start holding hands and singing Kumbiya though.”

-Mr. Mutt

Survivor of the Month

More Quotes from Mr. Mutt, the Man, the Legend:

“We’re boned.”

“We’re boned beyond belief!”

“I’d say we’re boned to the 297th Power of Boned.”

“Did I mention we’re boned?”

Before I attempt to tell the tale of The Mutt, the man, the legend a disclaimer. While poring over the accounts on these pages, I have been reminded that  the man we know now as The Mutt, is NOT the same Mr. Mutt who first stopped in to discuss his strange encounter with an angel-like being so many months ago. I can’t help but blame myself. Maybe if I had been more diligent in investigating his reports, I could have prevented some of the terrible events that have transpired.

Let me try to explain, and you be the judge.

Mr. Mutt first visited the site after The Monstrometer identified him as a werewolf seven times in a row, normally a sure sign of lycanthropy. But Mr. Mutt couldn’t remember being bitten and neither his mother nor his father seemed lycanthropic.

Then a very strange, very tall angel showed up and tried to talk to him but Mr. Mutt was surprised. After a dramatic battle involving silver knives & leashes  vs a lyre & fangs, Mr. Mutt made the discovery that while angels can fly, they sure can’t swim. Whatever message the angel came to deliver, it remained undelivered. Did he destroy a messenger sent to warn him about the future? We will never know.

His first days on the site were pretty harmless. He coached Stigma through his chimera phase and fought the evil but probably delicious were-chimichangas. That was nice. He introduced us all to the martial art of Kyuki-do, a mix of judo, karate and Tae Kwon Do. Later Mr. Mutt would team up with Zyboragon and the Doctor during the Void Wars to explore some caves in Oregon and Maryland in search of the dimensional keys. More about that later.

Possibly the first sign of trouble began when Mr. Mutt discovered unexpectedly with the help of a garlic clove, that his closest friend was actually a vampire. And not just any vampire, the most powerful vampire ever, The Original. Further The Original informed him that he had given him vampire blood and put a spell on him when he was just a baby.

As a result of The Original’s meddling, Mr. Mutt suspected he was actually an angelic werepyre. Something that left him feeling pretty unhappy and well, boned, for a long time. He hated the idea that he could be killed by silver or entranced by harp music or burn up in the sunlight. First he vowed to find a cure then when The Original snapped his sister’s neck harvesting her for his evil plot, he vowed revenge.

But would he succeed? Or did The Original actually fuse with his soul and become The Mutt and turn him into the hybrid he is today? I’m still not sure and by Mr. Mutt’s own words, you can’t trust Mr. Mutt’s opinion on the matter.

Let’s go back to Mr. Mutt the angelic werepyre. He got himself a daywalker ring and in between plotting The Original’s death, he helped Ashpaw escape the Silverbloods. Not just that, but he even went so far as to erase her memories with experimental therapeutic hypnotism and give her a few thousand dollars CASH.Not bad.

(Although you do have to wonder where did he get that cash anyway? But I digress.)

As often happens with evil nemeseses, Mr. Mutt had his first encounter with his nemesis The Original when he wasn’t ready yet. The Original kidnapped him in his sleep, which hardly seems fair but Mr. Mutt fought his way out of the abandoned warehouse and found safety at a McDonalds.

(We don’t know what he ordered. He did learn one thing during his ordeal though. The Orginal did not turn into an angel but into a bird-like demon.)

Luckily sometime after this Mr. Mutt  discovered something about his mother – she was a witch. So when he finally faced The Original in open battle in the dimension known as rt666, he used a “Leach” spell that his mom gave him, which leached all of the Original’s power and left him defeated.

At this point you might expect Mr. Mutt to take a holiday, maybe get a little sand and sunshine, enjoy the feeling of not bursting into flames and read the book about witching and intestinal ripping that his mom gave him.

But it was not to be. Suddenly it wasn’t enough to have killed The Original. The Mutt starts obsessing about going back in time and killing The Original all over again, before the events of his childhood can take place. To Mutt’s credit, he’s worried about the time paradox he might create and how that might affect the rest of us so he doesn’t actually try it.

(It might also have something to do with a warning he gets from his future self, telling him not to do it.)

But maybe he actually should have tried, because the next thing you know – Mr. Mutt has died. He met his unfortunate demise helping The Doc and later Zyboragon and Mr. Jaffa fighting the Silverblood demons who at one time possessed Stigma. To summarize, there was some flaying and some dying.

Because of this, Mr. Mutt was resurrected from the dead but he would never be the same. That’s when it happened. When Mr. Mutt discovered that he hadn’t actually succeeded in destroying The Orginal, and that he had become a hybrid, fused with The One.

In short, Mutt came back from the dead with a massive headache and stumps where his wings once grew. Most of his soul was gone too. Which could account for his new, somewhat crustier attitude on the site.

As Zyboragon learned the hard way, where once you could count on The Mutt to avenge you, now you had to be careful he didn’t just avenge you and then kill you. And then avenge you again. And then kill you again. At least he was polite about it. He would always urge you to, “die well.” Not quite as nice as the way he used to leave you rescued with thousands of dollars in cash, to say the least.

So began a trying time here at SOS. There was some mayhem. A little evil. And evil rhyme.  Let’s just say the moderation filter may have crashed more than once. To everyone’s surprise, Mr. Mutt teamed up with Zyboragon’s arch enemy ARC.

As Mr. Mutt himself went on to say, “Why any of you still trust me is beyond me.”

Well maybe it’s the memory of those early days and the courageous Mr. Mutt of yore. Or maybe we all hope Mr. Mutt has a few more thousand dollars to give away. For whatever reason we all continue to hope for the best as he settles into his new hybrid identity.

And for the most part we are not disappointed. He is still a great Survivor and he still has a lot of good advice. Not to mention some excellent one liners, if I do say so. Just be cautious. Don’t snack on his emotions! (He hates that.)

And if you see him in an epic battle for his life, maybe give him a hand or at least a word of encouragement like, “I hope you win!” At least that.

Thanks for keeping on and for reading The Saga of Mr. Mutt. Stay tuned next full moon for a new Survivor of the Month Story.

Seth

New Video – Interview with Suspected Werewolf

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Hail Survivors,

As many of you know, I recently went on location to interview a suspected genetic werewolf in his werewolf containment facility or crib.

Like many suspected werewolves, Louis Pine was puzzled about his lycanthropy status after failing to transform under the full moon. He wrote into SOS asking for advice and many of you responded with helpy werewolf hints and tips.

So when he invited me to help him document his lupine life, what could I say? He even had his own camera. I could not refuse. I set my GPS and hit the road.

I travelled to meet Louis this summer in his crib and well  *SPOILER ALERT*  I survive. I can’t say the same for anyone else.

Also if anyone knows the current WERE-abouts of the survivor known as “Louis,” please contact the site ASAP. He’s been MIA for several months now and lots of people are really worried about him.

Graham is helping me finish Louis’ videos to show on the site. I expect to be posting them in the next few weeks. Until then here’s part of my interview with Louis Pine, suspected werewolf:

Thanks for keeping on keeping on with me.

Seth

P.S. More videos coming soon. Ish.

Braces and Werewolves

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Hail Survivors,

Friends of the site and survivors everywhere, Pauzzis97, has just raised a very interesting point, can having braces on your teeth prevent a werewolf from transforming? Are braces a tool used by worried parents to prevent kids from wolfing out?

Her question really got me thinking and it occurred to me that I don’t know the answer to that one. So I am putting it out to all of you. Please vote in the poll below with your answer and I’ll put the result into the next update of The Monstrometer. If you have additional information or comments then please leave a comment in the comment section below.

Can braces prevent a werewolf from transforming?

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While I was thinking about this I realized that Louis Pine has braces. Could that be the reason he didn’t transform? Take a look at the video and let me know what you think. In the meantime I am going to be looking for a werewolf orthodontist to ask.

More of Louis’ videos are coming soon.

Thanks for the amazing insight Pauzzis!

Keep on keeping on.

Seth

Threat posed by PeopleNet revealed by TimeKitsune

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Hail Survivors,

I recently received a troubling series of emails from noted SOS contributor TimeKitsune detailing a new threat that he discovered called PeopleNet. An artificial intelligence (AI) that controls large transport trucks. TK reported that he had evidence of reports that PeopleNet is likely to evolve into a super-powerful AI that had the extinction of the people it was named for on its evil silicone brain. Here follows TK’s report.

Small isn’t it? But Mr. Christner assures me it’s up to no good.

Today I went on a trip in a truck a Kenworth to be exact. The reason for this trip was to go to an abandoned observatory to get a closer look at the new planet. The truck was a newer model and I was shocked upon entering the vehicle to find a small device known as PeopleNet. This device tracks your miles records you miles to the gallon and other handy things. But do not be fooled by this device. I was talking to the driver of the truck, a Mr. Don Christner (a pure human by the way) and he said “I done tested this thing one time and found that if I were to hook this thing to a couple a wires under the hood. It will completely control the trucks speed.” now this may seem like a good thing until you think about it in the sense that this thing might actually have an A.I. Of some kind and it may be the precursor to the legendary SkyNet from the popular movie “The Terminator.” please send out a warning to steer clear of this device known as PeopleNet.

I’m using my iPod to do this using an app the turns my speech into words.

TimeKitsune: Mr. Christner I would like to ask you a few questions.

Mr. Christner: That device is copying everything I’m saying.

TK: Yes sir, it is.

MC: So how does it work?

TK: It’s an AI kind of like your PeopleNet except it serves me not like PeopleNet. Ok now let’s get back to the PeopleNet.

MC: Yes now see a few months back the government made requirements that we was supposed to stop truckin’ at a certain time, 10 hours. Any ways they build this device that is being put in all the trucks, it called a PeopleNet. This device calculates Miles Per Gallon I get. My average speed and other things. The bad thing is that after 10 hours it shuts my truck off for 8 hours. That’s great unless I’m in New Mexico and 12 hours from home.

TK: Mr. Christner could you tell me how the PeopleNet is a bad thing.

MC: In a second son, could you umm……open a window or something. You kind of melting my coffee maker.

TK: Sorry sir hold on. Here take this and just answer my question and then put the device outside and walk off I’ll pick it up and email my friend.

MC: Ok now the PeopleNet is a device which is controlled by the government. The AI they use knows exactly where the speed limits are and what the speed is and every thing. So one day I gets this idea and I get a friend of mine by the name of Bo to plug it into my truck somehow. Well he did and this thing automatically adjusted my speed. I never even put my foot on the pedal. Well then one time we were talking and I ask him if it would be possible to make it drive my truck. He worked for the whole day and the next morning I turned it on and the truck started driving itself. This was great and I started to fall asleep when it veered over into the oncoming lane. I instantly realized that this was a Bad idea…..cool I said with a B and it gave it a B………umm I am now weirded out. Any way the short of it is that I ripped out the cables which plugged the thing in and gave it power. Well um I’m just going to leave this right he………

TK: Ok so I guess that’s the story and you can see how bad that this is I will talk to you later Seth and to coin a phrase “Keep on Keeping on.”

Thanks to TK for taking such step that went so far as to even risk his own safety to get the word out to survivors about this new threat. Stay alert and if you see one of these consoles somewhere whatever you do don’t let it have a hard line.

What is even more troubling than TK’s report on PeopleNet though is what he was researching when he discovered PeopleNet, a planet full of Space Vampires that appear to be looking at Earth for new feeding grounds. I am all for welcoming visitors but I personally think that we already have a hard enough time keeping our earthly vamps satiated with out adding potentially millions of alien vampires. That kind of thing can really upset an ecosystem.

In further troubling news TK’s recent report of the Fire Rose may have been TK’s undoing. I’ll post some links here shortly revealing what has been going on with that but the short version of the story is that bad things are happening.

Here are some links reflecting TK’s current situation:

http://sethonsurvival.com/?p=605&cpage=72#comment-98118

http://sethonsurvival.com/?p=605&cpage=72#comment-98129

http://sethonsurvival.com/?p=605&cpage=72#comment-98150

As disturbing as this all is we have seen some very powerful time manipulation lately and this may only be a temporary state of the timeline. Let us hope.

Hang in there Survivors and keep on keeping on.

Seth

Beware the Fire Rose

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Hail Survivors,

I recently received an email from Time Kitsune with some information about a very strange and magical new flower known as the Fire Rose or Ignis Rose.

This beautiful but deadly flower, which may have been developed by A51, emits light that has the same effect on vampires as direct sunlight. The efficacy of daywalker rings in resisting the light of the Ignis Rose is so far untested, at least to my knowledge.

Time Kitsune discovered this weaponized flower and asked me to put out an alert with this information here on the site so here it is. Please be careful. It is unknown what other properties it may possess but if A51 is behind it you can bet it is not good news.

Thanks to Time Kitsune for the intelligence.

Keep on keeping on.

Seth