New personal portable wormhole that fits in your suitcase to terminate time tourism turbulence?
A team of three physicists from Barcelona, Spain unveiled the first functional portable wormhole generator to cheers from survivors of another turbulent time travel season but big boos from the time travel agents who depend on them.
“A theoretical proposal by Greenleaf presented a strategy to build a wormhole for electromagnetic waves..however, an actual realization has not been possible until now. Here we construct and experimentally demonstrate a magnetostatic wormhole,” the team reported here in the journal Scientific Reports.
While Doctors Jordi Prat-Camps, Carles Navau and Alvaro Sanchez refuse to claim their suitcase-sized wormhole generator (photo below) will revolutionize the time tourism industry, disgruntled time travellers everywhere have high hopes that it will do nothing less.
“Look, I paid for a simple ancestry vacay to prevent my little brother’s conception. Is that too much to ask?” comments one such disgruntled time tourist. “Instead I woke up stranded in the Triassic, not a single hot tub device or Tardis to be found.”
In his lawsuit against the time travel agency in question, the tourist writes that, “After almost drowning in a monsoon, I would have prayed for a dinosaur to come and extinct me… but not even a dinosaur would set foot in that poopy epoch.”
While this tourist and his agency continue to fight over a refund, he and other survivors like him are vowing to purchase a personal portable wormhole unit like this one before taking a chance with another tardy time travel trap next year.
But will the suitcase wormhole really do for time tourism what mobile cellular technology once did for computing?
Not surprising time travel agents want to deliver dire warnings to would-be wormhole buyers.
“Do you see any temporal or geographic control settings on the device in this photo?” writes one angry operator. “Exactly! There are none. So how can it even send you to the correct place, never mind the right time period?”
“At least we get the approximate geography right 99 percent of the time. It’s really not our fault if your family tree hasn’t evolved yet.”