This man man claiming to be a famous Zulu singer returned from the dead this week, says he survived a terrible two-year kidnapping by zombies after a witch placed a spell on him.
- Man claiming to be Zulu singing sensation “Mgqumeni” returns from a two year kidnapping ordeal
But only two of his three wives and girlfriends agree and authorities intend to charge him with fraud.
This week the man appeared claiming to be Khulekani “Mgqumeni” Khumalo, an award-winning Zulu folk musician who died in 2009. His story caused riots at the singer’s former home after fans of the singer heard the man’s story about a witch doctor who marked him with a spell, causing him to be kidnapped by a herd of roving zombies.
Using a loudspeaker, he explained that zombies kept him alive in a cave for two years until he finally managed to escape with all his brains – but none of his trademark dreadlocks.
(Presumably the zombies shaved his head in preparation for his eventual de-braining – not an uncommon practice among civilized zombies who prefer to prepare their meals in this manner.)
The un-undead singer was greeted warmly by two of his former wives, who believed his story and took him back. But his third wife was very skeptical.
“What? Two other wives? I don’t care who he is, send him back to the zombies!”
She called the police who are considering fraud charges.