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Zombie Outbreak in Texas!!!

Hail Survivors!

I recently received a very grave -no pun intended- warning from Survivor Miles who I believe may be located in or near Texas. Survivor Miles recently survived a vicious zombie attack, armed with only his wits and hedge clippers. His parents unfortunately were not so lucky.

Read more here: Zombie Attack!!!

Seth

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How to Summon Fairies: Lessons from the Fairy Ladies

FAIRY LADIES OF ENGLAND SHARE SECRETS

It’s probably the 14th most frequently asked question here on SOS – Seth, how do I summon a fairy? Preferably a transit fairy so I can stop missing the bus?

I’ll admit it’s a question which I have been slow to answer. In part because I get caught up with the more pressing questions, like, how can I get a werewolf to bite me? And, is this a Seth Rogen fanzine? 

But also in part because dealing with fairies is not straightforward as it seems. Need I remind survivors that fairies are not just tiny, sparkly beings of light who grant your wishes but malevolent iron-averse shapeshifting creatures who want to drag you to a faery realm for a life of servitude?

No, finding fairies is not something I would recommend. The danger is real Survivors and before you read further I would urge you to review these warning about the dangers of trying to trap a fairy. What a relief that my campaign appears to have tamed that trend.

Lessons from the fairy ladies.

Lessons from the fairy ladies.

But if you have already read my warning here and you are still intent on summoning a benevolent fairy in flight form, who am I to judge? I myself once had a hair fairy and admittedly, it was one of the longest best hair days of my life.

(But trust me, you don’t want to hear the price…)

With that disclaimer out of the way, I now reluctantly present to you Survivors, top tips from the Fairy Ladies of England, a group of ladies who say they have cracked the fairy code to commune regularly with the fae folk.

4 FAIRY FINDING FACTS

1. Flowers Attract Fairies

Fairy lady Jeanette Gage of Sutton England (opposite) uses Larkspurs, Fuchsia and Sweetpeas but her all time favourite is much easier to cultivate: dandelions.

“When you blow on a dandelion you will see the enchanted spreading their wings on their journeys,” she reported to the Daily Mail this week.

(Of course this may also attract angry neighbours but that’s just one of the risks you take searching for fairies.)

2. Fairies Love Wind Chimes

Fairies are suckers for music and they can’t resist stopping to play a tune so get a good set of wind chimes and put it in a window or doorway. By a good set, I mean any kind that is not too heavy a fairy can’t move them with its tiny wings. Fact: fairies can hear a wind chime from up to 86 miles away. If they like yours, they will make a detour to your door.

3. Fairies Love Fountains

In this fairies are like the rest of us. They need water. In fact, fairies in flight get 30X more thirsty than humans. They plan their routes around gently running water sources like fountains, which are far less dangerous than raging rivers or waterfalls inhabited by the elves and mermish. Provide a gentle, reliable water source and chances are good you will find a flight of fairies before you know it.

Of course, if the only running water source you have is a touchy toilet, you could try this trick shared by a real fairy here on SOS. DRAGONFLY_FAIRY_HEATHER reports that a bowl of water infused with the essence of something sweet will lure a fairy like her to check it out.  Read all about Dragonfly_Fairy_Heather here.  Just make sure you change the bowl regularly or you could wind up with ants. And nobody, least of all me, wants that.

4. Twist three times and sprinkle yourself with fairy dust.

This one comes form Fairy Lady Bonnie Sullivan who discovered this trick as a child. She went into a wardrobe – i.e.: a closet if you live in North America – turned around three times and sprinkled fairy dust on herself. Then she went to the window and ajiji-majii-la-tarajii… the fairies found her.  This mother of three has lived with the fairies ever since.

Of course this won’t work if you don’t have any fairy dust or your closet is too small and/or too full for spinning around. Unfortunately SOS cannot at this time enlarge your closet space but here is a link to a report by WEREWOLF GIRL about fairy dust and where to get it.*

*Disclaimer: SOS assumes no responsibility for the quality of any magic items obtained through its pages. As there are many different providers and kinds of fairy dust, Survivors are advised to do their own research and order at their own risk.

And now I would be negligent if I did not repeat, Survivors, repeat, while I do not personally recommend it, if you must and do succeed in finding a fairy: NEVER ATTEMPT TO TRAP A FAIRY. Please review the truth about fairies here.

And keep on keeping on.

Seth

by Seth Greening - Visit SethOnSurvival.com

1 comment to How to Summon Fairies: Lessons from the Fairy Ladies

  • catveena

    It’s outrageous and false Although I do like flowers especially pink ones and wind chimes , yup wind chimes with bits of sparkle __come on who doesn’t like wind chimes . Ok maybe not everyone but most of everyone probably likes wind chimes. Except my bro who I think was adopted but can’t remember. And who doesn’t like water fountains nope can’t think of anyone who doesn’t like water fountains. Well ok maybe that one guy back in dream class who’s uncle or cousin lost a wing in one. Lol ahh

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