Coming soon to a highway near you, a free-spirited robot named Hitch announced his plan today to travel across the continent the old-fashioned way, by hitching rides with humans.
Hitchy the hippy robot has announced his plan to cross the continent this summer from East to West, documenting stories of human generosity here on his website beginning in Port Credit Ontario with high hopes of ending up on the West coast by the end of summer.
“I love meeting people and hearing stories,” he writes. “If you see me on the side of the road, pick me up and help me make my way across the country.”
Hitchy hopes his hitchhiking holiday will provide a friendly antidote to killer robot tales currently terrifying the world, while learning a few new desert recipes along the way.
But will it work? At least one garden gnome is already giving Hitchy the thumb’s down.
“This copybot is just another gnome-wannabe,” stated Gnome Severson. “Who wants to hang with a hitchbot who looks like that? He’ll never party with Paris Hilton like I did, I’ll tell you that much. He’ll never be People’s Gnome of the Year. He can’t even wash your windshield because his hands are permanently frozen inside those goofy green gloves!”
In his own defense, Hitchbot admits that while he can’t clean your car, he can promise endless games of trivia and a music mix that includes Kraftwerk and Styx.
“Yeah yeah, who cares,” said Gnome Severson sounding more than a little jealous. “If there’s anything I learned from Watson it’s that humans hate being beat by robots in their own games. Me, I look great and I can dance. My prediction? Hitchbot will be a rusty tin can on the side of the road within weeks.
If you want to prove Gnome Severson wrong this summer, keep your eyes open for Hitchy.
If it works for Hitchy, I might invest in a pair of green gloves down here in Austin Texas. It seems like a great way to save on airfare…by Seth Greening - Visit SethOnSurvival.com