Is sasquatch learning to surf? Bigfoot becoming a beach bum? If a new gigatopithecus population map is accurate, the answer to this question is probably: yes.
A sasquatch researcher made waves with his bigfoot population map that seems to confirm the new reality of urban sasquatches along the southern U.S. coastline, for instance California and Florida.
Bigfoot researcher Josh Stevens took the time to plot out every bigfoot and sasquatch report to the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization, all 3, 313 of them and his map showed an astonishing result.
While researchers have long assumed bigfoot is a loner who prefers the cover of tall trees and the safe isolation of low-population areas, a new map seems to confirm the existence of a new phenomenon – the urban sasquatch who takes to hot, high population zones of the southern United States, California and Florida for instance. See the blue zones on Josh’s map —>>>
On the East coast in particular, Bigfoot seems to be converging on cities in Florida. How can this even be possible? Are sasquatch and humans living together? Hiding in plain sight, maybe with the help of advanced hair removal technology? Or maybe just taking tours at specific times of year, say spring break and therefore being spotted more easily?
The data isn’t clear. I have contacted the BFRO and Josh Stevens for a further breakdown of the data that could answer these questions. Meanwhile, look out for the Urban Squatch, coming soon to a city near you, especially if you live in California or Florida.
Reminds me of “Urban Squatch.” No wonder he didn’t answer my question when I asked him if there were more of his kind…
by Seth Greening - Visit SethOnSurvival.com
I apologize Seth. I would have answered, but I find it best to let the Hashmuk, find things for themselves. I will answer any questions you have about my tribe.
Hail Urban Squatch,
Thanks for checking in between UPS deliveries but who are you calling a Hashmuk exactly?
That’s my first question.
Seth
My tribe (in human terms Sasquatch’s) call humans Hashmuk. As for the meaning let’s leave that unanswered since I actually enjoy the Hashmuk.
Hail Urban Squatch,
Ah yes. I am indeed still Hashmuk, tho only 93.45% today.
So tell me, why are the Sasquatches migrating south to big coastal cities like this, risking contact with human squatch hunters? You know there’s a million dollar prize for you right? There must be a reason?
Seth
The reason for our migration is because of deforestation. We cannot stay in our ancestral forests anymore, so therefore we must find new homes. I was among the first to integrate with your society. I learned your language and the Hashmuk accepted me. We know it is a risk, but we have been given protection and we wear disguises. We shave ourselves, but in truth we look a bit wild even then. Bottom line, deforestation means we come closer.
Hail Urban Squatch,
Thanks for your continuing replies. Of course this makes sense – deforestation. How do you live in these southern cities ie: in tall buildings, below ground apartments, beach houses, under bridges, on park benches…? Do you live with each other? Or among humans? Or alone at a safe distance from each other?
Seth
As to your first question. Most of us rent Apartments. But some of who made it big. I.E Jennifer Love Hewitt. Live anywhere. Some of us do enjoy distance. However, we do bunk with our family members or even Humans.