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Mermonsters

mermonsterDangerSign-Small-optMERMONSTER OR MERMAID

Trust me on this, true Mermish are not your maid! Behind those perky shells and streaming hair is a powerful aquatic being.

But with a few common sense rules you can minimize the threat posed to you by the mermish ie: mermaids and mermen, enchanted nymphs and naiads and assorted aquatic aliens:

1. Avoid water access points, the 3-Bs: boats, beaches and bathrooms.

2. Eliminate all waterways in your own home. Close the water pipes.

3. Do you own a fish pond, tank or bowl? Consider finding a new pet. Unless the thought of waking up with a giant Koi munching your eyeball is appealing to you.

4. Purchase one or more stylish, safety approved Life Vest or PFD (personal flotation device). Wear it at all times. You won’t see the wave coming until it’s too late.

5. Mermonsters love bubbles so if you see bubbles coming you might want to run. And you may also be able to distract an angry mermonster with a simple bubble blowing device long enough for you to get away.

6. Avoid  sewer grates especially during a heat wave. Not just because of the bad smell but because Mermonsters – particularly in landlocked cities – will take cover in the sewers to keep themselves moist and cool when nothing else is available. This is unpleasant business for any mermonster who is used to being very clean and it makes them very irritable. To pass the time they play TAG and TRIP with creatures who pass over the sewer grates. *All hail to Hails & Sereina for the great tip.*

IF THE  MERMONSTER IS YOU!

Ah, hi. Please don’t explode my drink in my face. I know you’re not a MONSTER monster. Mermaids are great. Really. Who doesn’t love mermaids? Besides fishermen and some sailors, everyone loves mermaids. There are lots of mermaids – men on the site below. Here are a few of the tips submitted by the Mermish on this site:

1. Always drink through a straw to minimize the chances of water touching your skin and triggering a fishy reaction when people are watching.

2. Some mermaids MUST bathe every 24 hours or they start to weaken and die. If you are this type of mermaid carry a spray bottle of water with you where ever you go.

3. Never let the fish follow you home. You may want to save them all, you but a floating fish in a bubble of water who follows you everywhere you go is like hanging a sign on you that says, “MERMISH.” Not a good idea.

by Seth Greening - Visit SethOnSurvival.com

524 comments to Of Mermonsters and Mermaids: How to Handle the Mermish

  • MarissaDrowning

    are mermaids real? cuz i think i may be one. Help?

    • Hail MarissaDrowning,

      Thanks for this question and welcome to the site. Mermaids are most definately real and the easiest way to find that out is to just ask one of them to clean your room and see what happens! That room will be clean alright but you’ll be sleeping with the fishes.

      Seriously, the existence of the mermish has been well-documented for centuries. But more importantly, what makes you think you might be one? Can you make your voice really high and talk to whales? Do you love shells? Do scales appear on your skin if you don’t bathe daily?

      Any info you share will help us make the Monstrometer better!

      Keep on keepin on,

      Seth

      • MarissaDrowning

        well, a lot of what she said. actually pretty much everything she said 😳 although i dont think im a visitor. i feel really connected to the ocean, and i could sense when the tsunami would happen in Japan. I can also mold water in my hands if i concentrate. That’s kind of a big deal,right?

        • Hail MarissaDrowning,

          Thanks for reporting in and keeping on. How could you sense the tsunami? Was it a physical sensation? Or just a thought or a feeling? When you mold the water, how long does it hold it’s shape and what can you do with it? Does it become hard like glass? This one is news to me, I have to say.

          There’s a lot to learn still about you mermish. Like, do you read all those messages people put into bottles and just put them back? And do you change them first?

          Thanks for keeping on,

          Seth

  • Andraterra Nightshade

    Well,I heard most mermaids come out at night,because the moon makes the waves higher and better,and I happen to be an insomniac. I can sing REALLY well,and have been known to make the fish in fish tanks do tricks. I haven’t ever been close to a whale,so I wouldn’t know if I could speak their language,but I have a really wide pitch range. I have been known to get a little scaly, and freezing cold water doesn’t bother me at all. I am an amazing swimmer,and I love the ocean. As for shells,absolutely. I make shell jewelry all the time. If I go snorkeling, all the animals aren’t afraid of me, and some of them will let me ride or touch them(and were talking ultra-dangerous animals here) If I have sang for someone in the past 24 hours,they’ll do whatever I say.(and this is some really stupid stuff,believe me) especially boys. Boys will do some seriously crazy stuff. So,yeah,I kinda sound like a mermaid,huh?

  • Andraterra Nightshade

    Sorry,just had to prove sounding like a mermaid doesnt make you one. Im a visitor,and I sound like one. Just saying,you must have some pretty rock solid reasoning.

    • Deathin

      Hey do you know any powerful magic, Mrs. Nightshade? I will try to help you as well. Scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours, the saying goes. I need help finding Flamel, he surround himself with powerful people. Please help.

  • Deathin

    Triton died last night. He was assainiated. I will avenge him, with help from across the globe. His rival, the Coronitchthy has taken the thrown of Greece. It will not be long!

    • Hail Deathin,

      Thanks for keeping on! Is this a report from Iceland? How’s it going up there anyway? You check out the hot springs? Or you too busy managing your new territories?

      Not sure I have any great advice for you about the Coronitchthy… (except maybe he/it just needs a good scratch?) …Can you tell us more about this situation?

      Keep on deathin on!

      Seth

      • Deathin

        Well not much time… Virus that make permanent werewolfness, and other wereness has been released. Alert everyone!

        • Deathin

          Sorry in that post I was being chased by lycaon, the first werewolf. Fortunately he’s dead, well banished to the underworld. I was saved by Anubis, but I am a “slave” and suffer from temperary werejackalness (I’m an anubite) fortunately I can come and go as I please. And the virus is indeed real. It makes you a permanent form of your transformation. For example a werewolf. He is always a werewolf, but he’s more wolf than he was before. Your body figure changes. A werebat would have slim arms and legs, instead of thick, he won’t have hair and his legs would be real short in comparison to the rest of his body. I have to go, Anubis is calling…

          • Hail Deathin,

            NP thanks for checking in & keeping on. Sorry to hear about your werejackalness. It happens. Having a jackal head is not so bad, it’s just having to look at everybody sideways gets hard on the neck. Or so I hear. Speaking of hearing has your hearing massively improved owing to your new superbig ears?

            (I bet this is all because of that unfortunate looting incident in Egypt and the opening of the mouth ceremony business. Mental note: next time ask Stranoparanormale for the CURE not the CAUSE.)

            Okay I did find one piece of advice that might help here. When your new mummy overlord goes to rip your heart out of your chest don’t worry – he just wants to weigh it. So just tell him yours weighs between 9 and 11 ounces. He doesn’t believe you? Tell him to Google it. It’s a fact. A fact that could save your life.

            Keep on with the deathin on,

            Seth

  • MermonsterNicola

    Hiya
    I have a feeling I may be a mermonster but I just need some second oppinions. Can you help?

    • LOLStigmaLOL

      Duuuuude!!!! Hiiii! This is too much of a coincidence! Nicola! Nicole! Mermonster I interrogated a friend who’s a mermonstah! Is that friend you?

    • Scarly

      M. Nicola, did you try the monstrometer? What did it tell you? Also mermonsters I think really like the bath. Do you have any scales or fins? Even if you don’t you could still be considered a mermonster, just really good at hiding. Also, do you hate sushi and other raw fish?

      -Scarly :mrgreen:

      Nice to meet you!

  • MermonsterNicola

    The monstrometer said I was a mermonster, I hate sushi or any other raw fish, when I stay in the water too long my hair stars to turn green, I take really long baths, and I can hold my breath longer than any other of my friends, but I dot have any scales or fins.

    • Hail MermonsterNicola,

      Thanks for checking in with this report and thanks for keeping on. I got a little behind with the update because of changes to XCode I had to learn about. Times like these I wish I were a cyborg like P5t5r! Okay but on to the real issue, the real question at hand or fin here – are you a mermonster or not? Well there are some pretty strong signs here we could discuss:

      1. You hate raw fish & sushi. This makes sense and thanks for pointing it out. I’m going to add sushi to the question database for the next update. Eating sushi must be like cannibalism to a mermonster. Do you experience a strong disgust reaction?

      2. Holding your breath longer than a human. No mystery here MermonsterNicola! This one seems clear and congrats on that. Can you open your eyes and see under the water too? That’s another sign although not definitive because in the final stages of your transformation you will probably develop a second set of eyelids.

      3. The scaly skin question. What Scarly says here is true. If you are currently a 100% land dwelling mermonster, you won’t need scales yet. However if you are one of those mermonsters who is being called back either to the lake or the ocean of your ancestors for some reason, you may find yourself experiencing a physical transformation that includes scales. Sometimes the scales arrive only during certain months of the year or only during certain days of the week or month or in some extreme cases the scales come at night. When they do come, it’s generally a signal to get yourself to the water fast!

      4. The name MermonsterNicola. I rest my case. With a name like that what else could you be???

      Take heart MermonsterNicola! Mermonsters are great! With the exception of one named Scylla who appeared briefly on the site who had seven heads and ate people, all of the mermonsters on this site have been great. In fact one of the first monsters I ever met was a mermonster named Amelia. Thanks to her reports we all learned a lot about the mermish life. She travelled in bubbles, that’s how she could live on land, surrounded by little bubbles that sometimes landed on other people. Unfortunately Amelia was called away on a mission or a trip or something. Do you like bubbles? This is one of the first questions that she would ask you.

      I hope you will keep on keeping on and check in when you can.

      Seth

  • MermonsterNicola

    Also a quick question- my sister is a mermonster, and my mum is a ghost, any threats there?

    • Scarly

      Wow! Youre definitely a mermonster.I think scales might only be with advanced Mer-ism. Also what kind of a ghost temperment does your mom have? I think this will be an important factor in wether there are any conflicts. 😳

  • MermonsterNicola

    What do you mean by ghost temperment? ❓

  • Scarly

    I mean is she a mean ghost? Does she do scary hauntings or is she more of a guiding spirit type? 😆

  • MermonsterNicola

    Hey Seth,
    Thanks for the help! To answer the two questions you asked;
    Do I get a strong disgust reaction to sushi? Yes, I do! It doesnt really feel right to eat sushi, if you get what I mean. And also can I open my eyes and see under the water? Yes, I can. At first it was quite blurry, but each time I do open my eyes underwater, it gets clearer and clearer. P.S to Scarly: my mum is more of a guiding spirit type of ghost 😀 Thanks both Seth and Scarly for all your help! :mrgreen:

    • Scarly

      I think you should be OK if she is the guiding spirit type. You could even work together sometimes maybe?

    • pauzzis97

      hey nicola ! do you have any advice or tips for mermaids ? my friend dani turned out to be one and i don’t have any idea of what to do !

    • Hail MermonsterNicola,

      Thanks for clarifying these future Monstrometer references. So can you eat the seaweed still? Or would that kind of be like me eating grass ie: theoretically possible but not exactly filling? Are you growing a second set of eyelids? Also what is the longest period of time you can spend on land before you have to take a dip? And then how long do you have to stay in the water? Are you like a mermaid or one of those alien tentacle-y mermish? Also do you have any tips for Pauzzis’ friend Dani who is a mermaid?

      Thanks for keeping on keeping on.

      Seth

  • MermonsterNicola

    Seth:
    I can eat seaweed, but like you said, it’s not exactly filling 😐 No, I’m not growing a second set if eyelids, and I can spend as much time as I want out of water (without dying or becoming ill etc) but after a while (maybe a few days or so) I get an urge to be in water, like it’s calling me or something. I’m more of a mermaid that an alien tentacle-y mermish. Also to Pauzzi and Dani, what sort of tips do you mean?
    Nicola :mrgreen:

    • Scarly

      Hey Nicola

      Is there any chance that you can open your eyes in saltwater without them stinging? I’ve always wanted this skill.

      Also, I hear that mermaids like to sing a lot, and that they sound pretty great when they write their own songs. Have you done any singing or song writing?

      Scarly

    • Hail MermonsterNicola,

      Thanks for checking in and clarifying the eyelid issue. I heard the same thing as Scarly re: mermaid’s song. But I also heard that you have to be careful when you sing or it can break glasses and communicate with whales and interfere with ship navigation. Now I’m not suggesting that you have caused any shipwrecks or brought any whales onto the beach coming to save you … but have you or has anyone you know? Also when you need to find water fast what do you do?

      Seth

  • thelancerock

    Hello Nicola! Sorry, Seth is currently on a mission (perhaps) right now. Sorry, but he has been gone for a while, but I’m sure someone here can help you.

    • Hail TLR – Thanks for keeping on and filling in here. Much appreciated. Your comments help me to survive too. I try to get on every other day or so and I always follow your comments on my phone even when I can’t reply but sometimes between my pizza delivery day job and research at night, I get behind.

      Seth

  • MarissaDrowning

    dear Seth:
    Im positive i am a mermaid! you remember me, dont you? anyways, i accidentally drowned someone…what do i do?!
    ~Marissa

    • thelancerock

      Hi! I’m NOT Seth as you can see but, I’d like to give you advice

      1. Hide the body of that person, or better yet dog a grave for him/her

      2. Of course, you’re guilty of what happened, but you have to let it go. What’s done is done. Just watch out, because people might start a hunt for you.

    • Hail MarissaDrowning,

      Thanks for checking in of course I remember you. Ever since you first wrote into the site I’ve been trying to mold water. So far the only time it works is when I freeze it first but somehow I don’t think that’s what you meant….

      Okay but back to this drowning business. Unfortunately you seem to have discovered the dark side of the whole mermaid business. Somehow it seems to get lost in the long wavy hair and bikini business but there it is. Before you turn to TLR’s advice, can you tell us how it happened? Did you know him or her? Can you still take him down to your underwater homeland and restore him with your mermaid mojo?

      Seth

  • MarissaDrowning

    Well,no freezing water isn’t how I mold it, but I’m glad you were practicing! I did know them, their name was Segei Truetts. He was an A51 agent, trying to catch me. I didn’t mean to kill him! I was out in the oven,he was pretending to drown,so I tried to save him. He wrapped his hands around my neck,trying to strangle me. I dived,hoping he would let go. But he didn’t. He drowned. I didn’t know him very well,just who he is. Or was. I thought of reviving him with my,um,”mermaid mojo”,bit then he would see my underwater home,and try to kill me. Again. Should I feed him to my shark, Steven?
    ~marissa

    • thelancerock

      Well, it’s not really how we do things, us monsters, killing people hunting us, but if you see no other way let the shark feast on him, however, try to keep him alive, in a place far from your hideout.

  • MarissaDrowning

    No,I didn’t freeze it, but I’m glad you were practicing! It was an accident! I did know him,but only enough to know his name. He was Sergei Truetts,and he was an A51 agent. I was out in the ocean,and he was pretending to drown. I tried to save him,but he was trying to strangle me. I dived to get away,hoping he’d let go,but he didn’t. So he drowned. I thought of restoring him with my,um, “mermaid mojo”, but then he’d try to kill me. Again. Shoul I just feed him to my shark, Steven?
    -marissa

    • Scarly

      MarissaDrowning,

      Unfortunately those pesky A51 agents can get a little persestent when it comes to hanging on, but I don’t think that was your fault – if he wouldn’t let go, then that was his call. I do hear that A51 agents have a 3-revival claus in their contract, which means that the government will revive them three times if they die in the line of duty. Maybe you could send him to their doorstep anonymously, even packed in ice. I’m pretty sure he’ll live to chase again someday.

      I think its pretty cool that you have a pet shark. What does Steven like to eat the most?

      Scarly 🙂

  • MermonsterNicola

    To Seth and Scarly,
    I do like to sing, but unfortunately I’m not too good at it 😕 Luckily I havn’t caused any shipwrecks etc, and I don’t know anyone who has. If I want to find water quickly, I either jump in the bath, or I walk down to the sea, as I’m only 15-20 mins away from the beach. I also can open my eyes in the sea without it stinging.
    Nicola :mrgreen:

    • Scarly

      Mermonster Nicola,

      Have you tried singing under water? I hear that mermaids who sound a bit funny above the water sound AMAZING beneath the surface, just make sure not to gulp the water in while you’re practicing your vocals, or your mermaid ‘mojo’ as Seth calls it, might not work and you could be in trouble!!

      I’m so jealous that you can open your eyes in the ocean, I tried it once and my eyes were so red for four days. I was wondering if mermaids can sing to oysters and make them open to find the pearls.

      Scarly 😀

  • MarissaDrowning

    Well,Steven so far has quite a taste for dolphin,although I don’t allow him to catch some often. Usually any fish is good,he’s not too picky.
    -Marissa

    • thelancerock

      Wow. What a very trained shark! 😀 I wish It could be that easy with my sister. Sooooo picky when it comes to food.

    • Scarly

      MarissaDrowning,

      Is there any chance that Steven has a laser attached to his head? I’ve been dying to find the illusive laser shark forever.

      If Steven has one – that is so awesome, and how does he use it? If he doesn’t – have you ever seen another laser shark?
      😛

  • Rebecca (lil sis)

    dear seth i am probaly part lion but i can make water float over my head when im not touching it

  • Rebecca (lil sis)

    I got scanned THREAT DETECTED help me

  • MarissaDrowning

    Dear Scarly,
    why yes,he does have a laser! But not for the reason you’d think. He doesn’t ever use it for hunting,(its too unsportsmanlike) but uses it for protection from the Deep Sea Devils. What are the Deep Sea Devils? They’re a gang of sharks and occasionally some of those fangly fishes(real name angel fishes). Yes, sharks have gangs,too. He uses it telepathically if hes able, but if hes too lazy, he just needs wriggle his left fin.
    And Thelancerock,
    as for training, training sharks are pretty easy, as long as your not trying to train a lemon shark, those things are like rabies on steroids, and you establish you are not food, but a trusted friend, and you too belong in the sea. As for training little sisters, I’d guess it’s probably around the same thing. Treat them more as a friend then a pet.
    -Marissa

    • Scarly

      Marissa Drowning,

      That is SO cool. Sharks with lasers are so hard to come by, and ones with a sense of sportsmanship and fair play are even more rare. Please wish your shark well – do you think we will ever see him on shark week?

      Scarly

  • Frost

    Hello Seth

    My friend showed me this app you call “Monstrometer” and He said that i was showing signs of being a Mermonster. So it turns out I am! I’m having a few problems thought managing being a Mermonster. Swim class was very hard with controlling the water, and my pet fish almost jumped out of its tank.. Even last winter I was walking through the snow and I slowed down and my whole body seemed to turn to water, then quickly to ice. Frozen in place. So any helpful suggestions to avoid more situations like this? Thanks

    Frost

    • Scarly

      Hello Frost – sorry you’re having problems with your new mermonster status, it can be challenging learning to deal with strange side effects. When I first transformed into a werewolf I had some big problems too. Here are my suggestions:
      1. It sounds like you may have to swim in outdoor waters where there are natural waves so you can blame strange water patterns on the weather. Otherwise maybe convincing the swim class that the pool is a wavepool might work.
      2. are you a mermonster from antartica or the north pole? I think they have added ice controlling abilities, but I’m not sure.
      3. you may be able to communicate with your fish since you are mermonster, maybe talk to him about his jumping tendancies and convince him to stay in the bowl. Maybe he just wants to change the channel on TV?

      let us know how it goes – glad to hear from you!
      Scarly

    • Hail Frost,

      Thanks for checking in and sorry to be so long replying. (I’ve been on a full moon WW intervention – tell you all about it soon.) Glad that Scarly was here. She’s a WW but knows a lot about a lot of things. But back to your question – how do you avoid situations like your pet fish following you to school? Or your feet morphing into a fin?

      Well as you are discovering it’s not easy. Mermonsters have more transformation anxiety than almost any other morphic being – and with good reason. Did you have a hole in your shoes and/or socks? You may want to invest in new footwear and double up on your socks because If I understand correctly, it sounds like you were walking in snow, and some melted snow touched your foot and and began to trigger a mermish transformation. For some it just takes a single drop of water to trigger. Dry feet are important for ALL survivors, even more so for you mermish in northern climes – unless you want to find yourself in frozen fish aisle of your local grocery story. It’s one of the ironies of being mermish – you need the water on a regular basis or you will start to dry out but water at the wrong moment can mean exposure and death.

      So what happened in your case? Did you manage to get home before anyone saw?

      Seth

  • MarissaDrowning

    Scarly,
    I told Steven and he told me to tell you that, and I quote, “thank you! How kind. I actually pride myself on fair play and sportsmanship. Mostly. Sort of depends on the scenario. Anyways, as for an appearance on shark week, I actually got a role! But, when they saw the lazer, they got a little freaked out, and quite rudely took back my role, saying that they “didn’t want me to eat the divers and/or the diver’s equipment” and that “a lazer doesn’t show sharks in the correct light”. I can’t help that IM A SHARK! I do what sharks do! How rude,right? I thought so,too. I was so distraught, even after eating most of them. They were too chewy, and gave me a bad belly. Marissa couldn’t leave me at home for days! And as for “training” me, it wasn’t me who got trained! Those mermaids are the hardest thing to train! So touchy. Anyways, there you go.”
    So, yes, there’s Steven’s outlook upon the sea. Quite a diva of a shark, yeah? Well, he has his girly moments and his super-scary lazer shark moments. Don’t we all? Any other questions? I’d be glad to answer them!
    -Marissa

    • Scarly

      Marissa thank you for typing out his quote. Maybe if you wouldn’t mind you could tell Steven that perhaps if I ever write a movie called Laser Sharks he would like to star in it? But there would be a no biting rule about the cast and crew.

      What I WOULD like to know is if mermaids/mermonsters can dance?

      Scarly

  • MarissaDrowning

    Steven: “A movie? All about me? OF COURSE!!! I mean,…you’ll have to talk to my agent…”

    As for us dancing, it’s a yes. Merpeople are extrememely music and art oriented! So oriented that music is the main focus of schools under the sea. I myself sing quite beautifully, and adore singing. Currently under the sea, these are the top five songs:
    1.) The New Hello (His) (by Hawk in Paris)
    2.) Want You Gone (By GLaDOS)
    3.) The New Hello (Hers) (By the Hawk In Paris)
    4.) ‘Til the World Ends (by Britney Spears)
    5.) Last Friday Night (by Katy Perry)

    • Scarly

      Impressive! I’m so glad to know that Merpeople are such fans of the arts. Do you put on shows and have musicals and festivals? If I could find something to help me breathe under water, I would come to a show.

      I’d love to see a merperson ballet! Have you been to one?

  • SlashLycan07

    I’m not a draconian I’m a Mermaid! I’m sorry Scarly. I should have never doubted what you said. I had a dream ( which are always true ) tell you later have to go

    • Hail SlashLycan07,

      Thanks for this update from the deep. Chalk another one for Scarly, who has recently been voted helpiest being on the site in case you missed it.

      What are the new symptoms? Update us when you can and tell us about the dream.

      Thanks for keeping on.

      Seth

  • SlashLunaLycan07

    Update: I was on a beach where I was protecting the small mermaids from other mermaids who were fifty feet tall- who were not evil just mean- that wanted their scales and fins. From what I remember, we then walked up the hill – the mermaids on their tails – we were on. they were like driveways. All of their sizes evened out and they put on these skirt things that protected their tails in land and I did to because they told me to. Their names were : John, ( surprisingly ) Seth, Theadora, Alexandra, Victoria, Aquasia, Mernie, and Rain. Victoria and Rain were the only ones who talked to me, Luna. Then we did stretching class. Then the mermaid coach called all the mermaids over. She said ” John Seth Dora Alex Tori Aqua Mern Rain and Luna come on let’s go!” There were other people there. When she said Luna I freaked. Are you sure? I said. Yes I am. Coach said. Thats mainly what i remember. So after that we did goodbyes and Tori told me to tell SOS that all of this happpened. So there’s my story.

    • Hail SlashLunaLycan07,

      Thanks for relating the details of your watery recruitment. Very strange that one of them could have the same name as me. Could this really mean that another being could have the exact same names as moi… Weird.

      Also interesting to note that the mermonsters would come pick on the mermaids. This is a surprise to me. I always thought that mermaids could deploy mermonsters and even kept them as pets. Was this misinformation? Or has something changed? Were you able to talk to the big guys?

      Thanks for the great report.

      Seth

  • Queen Luna

    Well, I did talk to Seth… He was a big one. Of course, all he told me was the ancient mermaid and mermonster code of peace. Special, but secret. He also said for me to say hello to you. Do you know him? I’m very confused: why don’t you comment anymore. Oh God, I found a piece of hair on me!!!! It’s my Werewolf fur!!! It’s white on the end. Ok bye. Have to go to a ceremony.

    • Hail Queen Luna,

      Thanks for keeping on. I’m no Scarly but you can ask her yourself: This mermonster you encountered named Seth was NOT ME. While I may in fact be 0.1% Loch Ness Monster I’m reasonably sure that this one percent has not manifested. Although my feet are pretty scaly right now…. NO WAIT IT’S NOT ME… really. Ask Scarly. I don’t know if this mermonster has appropriated my name or if it’s just a coincidence or what. I don’t know much about the naming systems of mermonsters. Maybe you can fill us all in after this strange ceremony.

      Although if it WERE me I would like to think that I would in fact bear the secret code of peace. How secret is the secret code? You can’t tell us any more?

      Let us know how the ceremony went when you get a minute.

      Keep on keeping on,

      Seth

  • Queen Luna

    Sorry, I keep on changing my name. I know it’s not you Seth. Becides, I knew you were 99.9% human. I know that you’re here too, but I needed her because she said I was probably a mermaid but I doubted her. I feel sort of bad. Well, I’d really like to talk to her in a private place… Wait! Can you make a place for me, you, Scarly, Bebe, Mr. Mutt, and Alex? Just asking. I don’t care if you say no. I really want to talk to her. Sooooooooooo Bbbbbbaaaaaaaadddddddddd!!!! Do you still check around on the Werewolf and Vampire pages?

    • Scarly

      Queen Luna!

      Wow this is exciting! I am sorry I missed all of this. Sometimes I don’t get the emails that tell me about replies. If I’m missing something you can usually find me on the werewolf page and tell me where you need me.

      So here’s what I’m thinking. I bet Seth has an enchanted mirror (he wouldn’t know if he did) The mirror shows his image to the merpeople, who sometimes want to be like real people. The merman on the other side of the mirror chose Seths name to be more like him. ITs a really big compliment, though most of the time we never hear about it.

      You, instead of having a mirror have a dream connection. While you are not a full merperson, you have the ability to communicate with the through dreams. This is really valuable because merpeople dont like us trying to find them to communicated, but since they’ve accepted you through your dreams, you can be our connection. Having any part of you as a merperson is a very valuable gift.

      Don’t be scared, just try to learn as much as you can. Let me know if you have more dreams!
      <3 Scarly

      • Hail Scarly,

        Thanks for this explanation. I was not aware of this connection between the mermish and mirrors but it makes sense, they are masters of reflective surfaces. I will inspect all of my mirrors immediately.

        Er except that I only have one. And I keep it pretty dirty, you know, for safety. Do you think somebody stashed a mirror on me? Did somebody sneak it into my stuff? How will I find it?

        I went to the dentist recently. That guy has a suspicious number of weird mirrors. Do mermonsters work with dentists?

        Seth

        • Scarly

          Hi Seth,

          Good questions. Here is the thing, all it takes is one mirror. Since the merpeople have the universal mirror sensor (UMS) with them, they are able to track the position of any mirror. The dirt doesn’t bother them, since they are seeing through it, they can even see through curtains (fortunately not clothes, though). If they’ve chosen you, they can now see you in any reflective surface since they can track them all.

          It is a bit scary to think of it at first, but all they can do is watch and invite, they cannot hurt you through the mirror, and if they’ve chosen you, they don’t want to hurt you anyway.

          Hope this info is helpful.
          Scarly

          • Hail Scarly,

            Thanks for this helpful and disturbing info. Not even toothpaste smears will keep certain Mermish from tracking you.

            Guess I’ll just have to get rid of it and count on others to let me know when I have stuff stuck in my teeth or my hair’s sticking up. Hope Naya’s okay with that!

            Seth

  • Raven

    I NEED TO GET BACK HOME!

  • merwolf

    Seth–
    I checked the monstrometer, it says i am a mermonster
    but also a werewolf
    my braces are interfering with my change
    i believe there are traces of silver
    i think i’ll turn straight to my wolf when i get them off
    please help
    the wolf grows restless within me

    • Hail Merwolf,

      Apologies for the belated reply and ty for checking in with your supernatural condition. Although mermonster-WW is an unusual combination, new research (from Your Lupine Life) has suggested to me the Monstrometer could be detecting the so-called Wind Wolves.

      Wind Wolves normally transform in March under the Wind Moon. They love the water and can swim long distances and go without air for long periods of time. If you are a Wind Wolf, it could be no accident you contacted the site in March when the Wind Wolves normally would experience first transformation.

      It is true that your braces could be temporarily inhibiting your transformation but please don’t remove them yourself. There could be very good reasons your parents don’t want you to transform. Does your orthodontist behave suspiciously? How much longer do you need them?

      Thanks for keeping on out there,

      Seth

  • Greek geek

    I used to live by the coast but then my family moved to the driest place on earth. I’ve always had a deep connection to the sea and I’m a great swimmer but I miss the ocean. I’ve always been able to sing really high and people tell me that I’m a good singer but I mostly just sing for myself cuz I love to sing and I’m really shy. This is my first time on the website and after reading your article on the mermish I think I might be one of them so I was hoping that you could answere some of my questions.
    1. I love to swim but I am terrified of swimming with fish, is that normal?
    2. (This one is more of a statement) I think that mermaids and sirens are 2 different things cuz sirens use their powers of song to enchant sailers and drown them for their songs (that’s what they eat the songs from people’s minds.) and mermaids are the good ones who mostly like shiny/pretty objects from the sea and they eat sea plants and can control water.
    3. I don’t get scales but I have always felt a connection to the naiads in Greek mythology. Does that mean that I’m a naiad?
    Please reply to as many questions as possible.

    • Hail GG,

      Welcome and thanks for checking out the site. I will try to answer some of your questions – with more questions! – and I will try to point a few other survivors your way. There are a couple of confirmed mermish on the site and they may have better intel for you.

      But first, more questions in answer to your questions:

      1. Are you drawn to any particular water source? Or just water sources in general? Some mermish, (like Pauzzis on this site) will find themselves attracted to a particular cove or rock or even public fountain. Public fountain is the tough one – don’t get arrested!

      2. When you sing really high do you break glass? Or cause accidents – he I’m not saying you’re a siren. I’m only implying it, sine your brought it up… I’m just saying you should maybe check the news after every time you sing in the shower.

      3. Afraid of fish? I’m afraid this one has me stumped. I will look into it. Do you know what you’re afraid of exactly in regards to fish? Do they say mean things? or…?

      Thanks for keeping on when you can GG.

      Survivally Yours,

      Seth

  • Raven

    Seth, what catogory (sorry kindle typing) would Sirens come in on?

    • Werewolf13

      Well I’m no expert on this but I am guessing sirens are mermonsters. Sirens sing to reel in sailors and then they kill them so yeah..

      • Hail Werewolf 13,

        Thanks for jumping in here to help out Raven. It really does my heart good to know that there are awesome survivors out there like you who are willing to help others.

        Thanks again and keep on keeping on.

        Seth 😎

    • Hail Raven,

      Sorry I missed your comment here. It is always awesome to hear from you.

      I agree with Werewolf13 that you are totally posting this question in the right place. Sirens are in deed a form of mermonster. Mermonsters like soooooo many of the supernatural creatures here on the site come in many varieties so the possibility always exists for us to add to our knowledge base here on the site.

      So may I ask why the interest in Sirens? Have you recently encountered one or more?

      Further to that how have you been? Good I hope.

      Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

  • PCHS Student

    Hi. I think I might be a mermaid. Ever since I was little I’ve loved the water and marine biology. I couldn’t live without music and I’m told I sing well. I can hold my breath much longer than my friends can. Recently, whenever my legs touch water, or sometimes randomly, they feel strange. I’ve tried opening my eyes in the water and it doesn’t bother me in regular or salt water but chlorine it does. My legs tend to randomly cross themselves. Sorry if the information is all over the place.

    • Hail PCHS Student,

      Thanks for writing in and welcome to the site. It sure seems to me from your self report here that you exhibit many of the symptoms that would lead me to believe that you may in fact be (at least part) mermonster.

      Sorry for the slow reply. I am not always this slow but occasionally a comment gets missed and falls through the cracks in the system and I don’t see it until much later than I would have liked as has happened in this case. My apologies.

      Since your initial report have you developed any further symptoms that either correlate with or contradict this theory?

      Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

  • Wolflily

    I’m part mermonster part werewolf this explains my love of water

    • Knewwolf

      I’m not too fond of Sirens (as my old pack called them) myself, so a sirewolf is a matter of great confusion to me. I saw one once and immediately attacked, not knowing it was another of my kin. I try to keep away from them, they’re a solitary race, at least in my experience.

  • I prefer mermaid over mermonster 😉

    • Hail LWAW,

      Thanks for shedding some water on this wet topic. It never goes away around here. Some mermish object because they think it means you expect them to clean your coral reef or something. They prefer a “monster” moniker for a symbol of power. But as there are actually some mermaids like Linden Wolbert now cleaning coral reefs well… it’s hard to know what to say about that… let’s see if I can find that photo of Linden cleaning the coral reef….

      Maybe this should be our next poll question.

      Seth

  • Ocean

    Hi I’m new to this site. My friend scanned me with your monster testing thingy and it came up 88 point something percent that I was a. I don’t Mermonster have scales, I’m scared of cold water, I can’t hold my breath for very long. But on the other hand I love water, love singing, and doubt I’m 100% human. Help Please!

    • Hail Ocean,

      Thanks for your SOS report. There are a number of mermonsters er, mermaids er, mermish here on the site. I will link your report to the front page this week and see if any of them have advice or questions for you. In the meantime, consider this. Have you ever broken anything with your singing? And do you have a fish? If so, would you say you are close?

      Thanks for keeping on,

      Seth

  • Ocean

    Nope, I’ve never broken anything by singing but I can sing really high. And no I do not have a fish. I want one but my mom won’t let me get one. Another weird thing, I can control fire to a certain extent and sometimes can controle peoples minds. Any helpful hints?

    • Hail Ocean,

      Ok so no pet fish… Is there an aquarium near you? If so go check it out and see if you can “talk” to the fish? Maybe start with something easy like concentrating on getting them to swim in a certain direction.

      What are some things that you have been able to do with mid control? I mean besides making me type this question.

      I doubt that you are 100% human as well. There are very few pure humans left in the world.

      Seth

      • Ocean

        I can sense peoples presences, emotions, causes of emotions, and make people look a certain way or sometimes do something small. I’m really good at making people forget things. As for the aquarium, no, there’s non near me but I LOVE them. I’ve never tried talking to the fish but they don’t swim away from me when I snorkel. Thanks!
        Ocean

  • mary5544

    Anyone know a way I can become a mermaid because I love swimming and it would also be cool to have a tail

    • Hail Mary5544,

      Thanks for bringing this up. There has been several tips on the site over the years about this – a certain rock formation you have to swim through on a blue moon or a deal with Poseidon. I can neither confirm not endorse these reports – maybe some of the other survivors can – because there is always the risk of becoming a mermonster too.

      But one thing I can definitively state is this. Don’t fall for the mermaid tail traders! Do you really want a poached mermaid tail like this 7 year-old girl?

      Thanks for boycotting the mermaid tail trade!

      Seth

      • mary5544

        I don’t want a mermaid tail by doing the mermaid tail trade that is just plain gross and mean to the mermaid

        • Hail mary5544,

          I completely agree. There are some magical ways to become a mermaid. My friend Pauzzis97 had found some a while back. I’ll have to take a look back through the comments and see if I can find them.

          Do you have access to an ocean or other large body of water?

          Seth

  • mary5544

    No but when in the summer I have access to a creek will that work

    • Hail mary5544,

      I’ve never heard about a creek spell – but I’ll ask around. You could just end up a MUDmaid and that’s not quite as fun.

      There was a famous vampire on SOS once named Pauzzis who got tired of being well smoking hot – literally! – every time she went to the beach with her friends. So she wanted to become a mermaid. She tried the Sirena Spell of Lands End and Cabo San Lucas – you can read about it here. It worked for her for quite a while but I have to tell you its very dangerous. Even more dangerous than ending up a mud maid.

      That said, please check out the story of Pauzzis here…

      Seth

      • mary5544

        Uh Seth I may be a ww and what happens to a ww on a full moon they transform

        • mary5544

          What is a mudmaid

          • Hail Mary 5544,

            Thanks for keeping on while I catch up on the news around here. If you are in fact a werewolf – then congrats! Were you bitten? Or did you inherit it? If you were bitten by a werewolf, then yes, you will in fact experience your first transformation on the next full moon unless you succeeded in cleaning your wound with a good strong colloidal silver solution. In this case, consider preparing your crib immediately!

            If you are a genetic werewolf, it’s a bit different. Genetic werewolves can experience their first full moon at different times, depending on their genetic heritage and customs. Many clans and families have a first full moon ceremony to make the transition faster and easier while others do not.

            Do you suspect that you are bitten or genetic?

            Seth

            PS – I will post info about mudmaids after the full moon. Thanks for your patience!

            • mary5544

              If I am a ww I would have to be genetic but I think I know who I got it from it was most likely my dad because on the full moon he acts really strange I can’t build a crib because my mom does not know I think my mom was hopeing I wouldn’t inherite the gene and I also learned I have vampire in me so I’m it a lot of trouble from both sides

  • MerWater

    Hello my name is livingwithawolf ( well now BlackWolf) on the werewolf site. I think i may be a genetic mermaid on my moms side. I think that she may be one that has to be in water every 24 hrs or so. I get really panicky around spring time ( i live in michigan) because i really almost NEED to go swimming. Anywhere is fine. Preferablly a beach but a lake or a pool might do.

    • Hail Merwater,

      A belated thanks for this report. It does indeed sound like you may be mermish. There are of course two distinct categories of mermish. There’s the kind who emerge from the water and assume human form but primarily make their home in the water and the kind who live mainly on land and return to the water on a regular basis. It sounds like you would be one of the latter but that your mom could be one of the first category. Does she have a shell phone? Have you ever witnessed her talking to fish?

      Seth

  • Merwater

    Well i think she may be the second one you were talking about. Although could something happen during yhe full moon like in h2o just add water? The show by the way.

  • Merwater

    Omg! My birthday is on the full moon of august this year!

  • Zyboragon

    Do be careful about what you share, there are many hunters that won’t think twice about using any information against you, birthdays especially. They like using those because it’s common for creatures to let their guard down on special occasions.

  • mary5544

    Well on my birthday I don’t let my guard down instead I act more suspicious so I’m one of the creatures who don’t let their guard down

  • fishy334

    well… My friend was all like: “Hey ur a leviathan!” I dont even know what that is… What is the bigger surprise is that my friend is a self claimed werewolf -.- But i dont think werewolves exists.

  • Noelle

    My friend is a mermaid. A mermaid friend is awesome. She is a good mermaid so shut up. 😡

    • Hail Noelle,

      Thanks for reporting your friend to the site. I personally have no problem with mermonstrosities er, mermishness! I’ll have you know I participated personally in an effort to Free the Florida Mermaids which you can read about here. It was an exciting midnight operation that didn’t turn out quite the way I planned, but Graham has mostly recovered from being tail slapped. Also, I’m a signatory member of the Mermaid Tale Protection Society, to raise awareness about the illegal trade in mermaid tales, an important topic you can read about here.

      But I do object to being eaten and held against my will for a fortnight in the belly of a giant mermonstrosity wondering which end will be my end? AND I worry about survivors lured to their deaths by the siren song of a siren song, not to mention the promise of shell bikinis and flowing locks…

      So let me ask you this. How did your friend become a mermaid exactly? Was she born that way? Or some supernatural effort? Or did she buy an illegal mermaid tale?

      Tell me that and I may consider your other request….

      Seth

  • M.S. Aqua

    The monster meter said I am a mermaid.
    What are some tell tail signs? ❓

    • Hail M.S. Aqua,

      A tail!!! I would say the the most tell tail sign is a tail.

      Scales. Being a good swimmer, loving the water, excellent singer… those are all signs but if the Monstrometer says you are a mer, then its fer sure.

      I see that you are a good singer with hypnotic powers who doesn’t like sushi. That all fits. (Some merfolk don’t like to eat seafood cause it makes them feel like cannibals).

      How long can you hold your breath under water? Is it different than trying to hold your breath in the air?

      My main advice is to avoid growing a tail in public and sty hydrated! Water is your friend. You may also want to make sure that you live near water. The ocean or a lake if possible but a river or pond or even a stream (as long as it doesn’t dry up in the summer) will work in a pinch. Always stay alert and know the way to the closest body of water and…

      Most importantly scan everyone you meet with the monstrometer to find allies and enemies.

      Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

  • M.S. Aqua

    I don’t have scales or fins but I am a good singer and all my friends say that my eyes are so blue it’s creepy. I can also hypnotize people a little and if I lock my eyes onto some one elses than I can keep their gaze so well it’s creepy. I also hate sushi.

  • I’m a mermaid apparently, how do I deal with this. What are some tell tail signs? Answer Needed Now!

  • Aqua Marine

    Seth, now the monster meter said I am a vampire to! Is this a joke? 😕 ❓ ❗

    • Hail AQM,

      It is possible that you are a combo vampiric mermaid, which are no where near as uncommon as anyone would like, but it is also possible that your device is contaminated with foreign particles which fooled the Monstrometer’s biometric sensors. Vampires have a particularly strong aura and are prone to leaving contamination behind. Are you the only one who has handled your device recently?

      Seth

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