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Hail Survivors!

I recently received a very grave -no pun intended- warning from Survivor Miles who I believe may be located in or near Texas. Survivor Miles recently survived a vicious zombie attack, armed with only his wits and hedge clippers. His parents unfortunately were not so lucky.

Read more here: Zombie Attack!!!

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Mermonsters

mermonsterDangerSign-Small-optMERMONSTER OR MERMAID

Trust me on this, true Mermish are not your maid! Behind those perky shells and streaming hair is a powerful aquatic being.

But with a few common sense rules you can minimize the threat posed to you by the mermish ie: mermaids and mermen, enchanted nymphs and naiads and assorted aquatic aliens:

1. Avoid water access points, the 3-Bs: boats, beaches and bathrooms.

2. Eliminate all waterways in your own home. Close the water pipes.

3. Do you own a fish pond, tank or bowl? Consider finding a new pet. Unless the thought of waking up with a giant Koi munching your eyeball is appealing to you.

4. Purchase one or more stylish, safety approved Life Vest or PFD (personal flotation device). Wear it at all times. You won’t see the wave coming until it’s too late.

5. Mermonsters love bubbles so if you see bubbles coming you might want to run. And you may also be able to distract an angry mermonster with a simple bubble blowing device long enough for you to get away.

6. Avoid  sewer grates especially during a heat wave. Not just because of the bad smell but because Mermonsters – particularly in landlocked cities – will take cover in the sewers to keep themselves moist and cool when nothing else is available. This is unpleasant business for any mermonster who is used to being very clean and it makes them very irritable. To pass the time they play TAG and TRIP with creatures who pass over the sewer grates. *All hail to Hails & Sereina for the great tip.*

IF THE  MERMONSTER IS YOU!

Ah, hi. Please don’t explode my drink in my face. I know you’re not a MONSTER monster. Mermaids are great. Really. Who doesn’t love mermaids? Besides fishermen and some sailors, everyone loves mermaids. There are lots of mermaids – men on the site below. Here are a few of the tips submitted by the Mermish on this site:

1. Always drink through a straw to minimize the chances of water touching your skin and triggering a fishy reaction when people are watching.

2. Some mermaids MUST bathe every 24 hours or they start to weaken and die. If you are this type of mermaid carry a spray bottle of water with you where ever you go.

3. Never let the fish follow you home. You may want to save them all, you but a floating fish in a bubble of water who follows you everywhere you go is like hanging a sign on you that says, “MERMISH.” Not a good idea.

by Seth Greening - Visit SethOnSurvival.com

524 comments to Of Mermonsters and Mermaids: How to Handle the Mermish

  • Kilala

    Hey Seth,
    I could use some help trying to figure what I am. I’ve narrowed it down somewhat using the monstrometer. I’ve gotten the same three things twenty-six times. (1) Mermaid (2) Werewolf (3) Vampire. I’ve also done some research into my family history and found that I am a direct descendent of the first Werewolf. Don’t ask me the name cause I cannot spell it off the top of my head. Also, there is another type of mermaid. The kind I suspect myself of being. The Syrena are twice as powerful as your average, run of the mill mermish. What scares me the most is the death gods. They have taken a huge interest in me. The gods in question happen to be Pluto (Roman), Hades (Greek), and Anubis (Egyptian). Please give me what advice you can. If anyone on the site can help to it is appreciated. I’d be happy to help anyone in return.

  • Mermaid friends

    Hi Seth I need your help me and my friends are mermaids and we want to know if we have powers

    • Hail Mermaid friends!,

      Welcome to the site. Sorry for my woefully late response. Unfortunately as a mere human ** I am not always able to get to all the survivors as fast as I want to.

      Well if you and your friends are in fact mermaids then you almost certainly have powers but what exactly and how powerful they are depends on a lot of things, What type of mermaid you are? If you are a pure mermaid or mixed with some other type of being?

      Common mermaid powers include lots of aquatic things like super-swimming, talking to fish and stuff like that.

      Have you noticed that you can hold your breath for a really long time under water? Important safety tip: Do NOT try to breath water with your lungs That doesn’t work and is generally not a good survival technique.

      Do you know how it happens to be that you and your friends are all mermaids? Do you live near the ocean? Was there a nuclear reactor that melted down in your neighbourhood? Were you all experimented on as children by mad scientists?

      Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

      ** Note: Mere Humans are not the same as a meerkat. Humans are no where near as cute. Also note I don’t mean mer-human which is a name for a Human Mermaid hybrid.

  • TheStormborn

    I’m in a bit of a situation here…..do you know anything about Sirens?

    • Mr. Mutt

      Plug your ears. Just plug your ears so you can’t hear them. Agh no no no don’t do… Excuse me I think I may have destroyed something important

      • TheStormborn

        Um…..I think I’m the siren or at least something like it. Maybe half siren and half witch…there’s some interesting stuff I can do…

        • Hail TheStormborn,

          You are the Siren?!?!? I am glad this site is text based instead of sound based!! That said welcome to the site.

          What kind of interesting stuff can you do?

          Which parent do you think you inherited the siren part from?

          The answers to these questions will help get you started down the road to learning to control your powers.

          Keep on keeping on

      • TheStormborn

        Um….I think I’m the siren. Maybe a half siren half witch…the’s some interesting stuff i can do…

    • The Reaper

      May I suggest you tie yourself to something sturdy cover your eyes and hope for the best.

    • TheStormborn

      I haven’t been on in a while….but anyways, Seth, there’s more than one Siren. there should be four, I think. And you don’t always inherit it. you can be cursed into being a Siren. I can cast spells (complex and simple), sing, and swim. And probably some other stuff that I haven’t figured out how to do yet. I also know an unexplainable amount of things about the Supernatrual world. Like, ancient things about the “lost” city of Atlantis and their Pantheon of gods/goddess. I think I should avoid Music class at all costs this year, just in case, to avoid any “accidents”.

      • Hail The Stormborn,

        Thanks for your SOS update and the warning that are three more of you out there. Have you met the others? Have you been to Atlantis?

        Persistere, Persistens,

        Seth

    • Foxy02016

      Well I was a vampire merman werewolf but now I’m a Siren too I BLAME YOUR SONGING FOR CURSEING ME sorry again I am a WEREWOLF so you know how they can get ANGRY ESIALY anyway sorry

  • TheStormborn

    Oops. Sorry reposted that twice.

    • Foxy02016

      I’m a Vampire werewolf merman Siren I think your the one who cursed me might have been one of the other three but I haven’t met them so I know it was you

  • magie pat

    im living with 2 werwolf’americans what do i do also my dads and best friends a cyborg please help me

  • GinnyQHS

    I think I’m werewolf/ mermaid. I took the test 30 times and that’s what I got. I don’t think u can be both, can you??? I have amazing smell and hearing, also stealth and I live next to a forest. But I can swim deeper than one I know and can boil water and make small fires. Please help me anyone?!?!?

    • The Reaper

      Hail GinnyQHS!

      So, you think your a werewolf mermaid eh? It is possible. Mermaids can be on land for short periods of time. And during time there is always the possibility of being bitten by werewolf. If you don’t mind, can I ask a couple questions? Do either of your parents act strangely? Is your mother constantly needing water? Are you in any way shape or form craving some sort of meat? I hope I can help.

      The Reaper.

    • Fenrir Ulfangr

      Wolves always have had a very close connection with water. And if your family is from northern Europe, specifically the British isles there is a chance you possess merblood.

      • Eris

        “Wolves always have had a very close connection with water”–
        Since when? Maybe if they were fishies
        Hey that a good idea… literal dog-fish…

        • Hatter/Janus/guardianR.S.

          Look up the ancestry of the whale, Eris a wolf like dinosaur evolved to become a whale due to a lack of food on land

          • Fenrir Ulfangr

            Correct, except it wasn’t a dinosaur, dinosaurs were long dead by then.

            And wolves are often linked with water in the old stories, they are creatures of winter, winter’s element is water. Also actual wolves swim and even catch fish in rivers and lakes.

  • Ginny QHS

    My dad always drags me outside to look at the moon or Listen to the wolves. No my mom doesn’t constantly need water and I’m kind of hungry right now because I forgot to eat dinner, so yes I would very much enjoy some ribs right now.

  • GinnyQHS

    My mom is definitely my real mom,but is there any other way to become a mermaid than enheritance??? Sorry for the late reply

  • GinnyQHS

    Also my eyes normally change color so I’m used to it, but yesterday my eyes flashed yellow and got slits while I was looking in the mirror

    • Hail Ginny,

      Thanks for checking in. A very reliable mermaid on this site name Pauzzis once reported that there are several sites around the world that can, when the planets are properly aligned and the climate conditions just right, and the proper magic applied, on a full moon, can indeed cast a mermish spell on an otherwise non-mermish individual. Let’s see if I can find that link. I know that Cabo San Lucas is the one that Pauzzis used.

      Meanwhile, do you recall swimming anywhere strange after dark?

      Seth

  • GinnyQHS

    I don’t remember any thing like that… Sorry. But do remember waking up whith random cuts down my side every morning for a week. I know I didn’t leave my hose because we have weight detectors in the floor. They would have gone off.

  • Pawleen

    Hi Seth me my step cousin and some of my friends are werewolfs and we need some tips of how to survive werewolfs attacking us at night. plus can u do some werewolf videos.

    • Hail Pawleen,

      A belated thanks for this SOS message. Werewolves attacking at night can indeed be a problem. Invest in some silver bling immediately.

      While I have not yet made any specific Monstrometer Reports dealing with werewolves, there are some in the works. I did however visit MIA werewolf Louis Pine and appear here in his videos at yourlupinelife.com. Check them out they are very instructive. I draw your attention to the Maurcio’s struggle against his own impending transformation.

      Things move slow around here cuz are just a two human show surviving somehow, against all supernatural odds.

      Thanks for surviving with us.

      Seth

  • Pawleen

    Ps ur little camera kid is cute

  • Rainstorm

    Back! After a really…long…fishy….situation. I got turned into a mermaid by my best friend… As a “birthday surprise”. Not what I wanted, I’m a FISH girl when I touch water :/
    Being a mermaid.. is random…
    And when you’re a werewolf too, it doesn’t help 😛

    • Rainstorm

      It wasn’t her.. It wasn’t my friend. Here is my theory how me and my friend became… Weremaids? (OH MY GOD yes that’s a thing) okay so, exetreme nerd moment here: I believe that every person, human or not, has a virus, that is constantly being fought off, like cancer cells, all of us may have cancer at one time, but normal people just fight it off. I believe there are “mer” cells living inside of us, and if you don’t have a healthy immune system, balanced diet and exercise (and eat too much of bacteria growing foods) then well.. The cells multiply and multiply and effect your whole body, and since these cells change in the water, whenever you touch water, the cells metamorphasis into… Totally different cells, and you are left with my mermaid tail until you are dry when they morph back. They feed on LIQUIDS! So basically, that’s my idea. Me and this one friend have really weak immune systems.. It’s all meat meat meat, and muffins >:D, but anyway yeah.. We aren’t “fat” You don’t have to be fat to be a mermaid, that is not what I mean, but any other theories?

  • GinnyQHS

    Hey Seth sorry for the really late reply but do u know why my eyes chaged colors like that, they have been doing that a lot lately.

  • Rainstorm

    I used to know a Siren. No, her name wasn’t Sirena… Never try to record a Siren, sounds like beauty in person, looks like a madhouse in person, but sounds like a vampire with rabies when it’s recorded. It’s scary, scarier than those horror movie ghost screams. She was pretty creepy… She walked by people and sang a note and laughed as they went berserk. Rude, much? She moved away, too bad, I only got to record and analyze one of her songs.

  • TheStormborn

    Hey, Seth, you may remember me from an earlier post on here. Siren update: there are only three of us now. Number four decided to be an idiot and got caught in public. Oh well. There will be a replacement for her. To answer your previous questions,I have met one of the others on accident. we were both swimming in the same area by chance. As for Atlantis, yes, I have been there, multiple times, in different lives.

    • Hail TheStormborn,

      Thanks for the supernatural update. How goes the search for a replacement for number 4? Is there any possibility that you will ever able to get #4 back? How are you going to recruit a new number 4? Are you going to turn someone into a Siren and then force them to join? Are you going to find someone who wants to join and then turn them into a Siren? Or are you going to find someone who is already a Siren and ask/force them to join?

      If you are going to turn someone into a Siren how do you do that exactly? Do you bite them? Use a magic spell? Something else?…

      Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

      P.S. The next time you go to Atlantis can you bring me back a souvenir? Maybe like a map of how to get there, or a photo or a seashell with some goggly eyes glued onto it. Just please not a t-shirt. Every time I get a t-shirt my brother Sam just steals it and I never see it again… Hmmm come to think of it I haven’t seen Sam in a while either? You haven’t seen Sam have you?

      • The Stormborn

        So many questions! Number four….it will be hard to find a replacement. I do not know if the others have found another one yet. It is sort of possible to get number four back. Think ghosts and souls. If I can get four back as a ghost…she would have to use possession or soul swap (I have a full story on soul sharing/swapping) to come back fully…I would never force-turn someone into a siren. The others might, but as far as I know, we haven’t found anyone suitable. Finding someone who is a siren other than me and my two remaining sisters isn’t very hard, there are more of us than you might think…but whether they are eligible or not depends..on a lot of things…such as their lineage or ability. Also, I came across a scroll, but in bad condition. I could read only a little of what remained. It basically says that not all siren are female. Like, there could be a male siren. The law says nothing against it. As for turning someone into a siren…it usually requires the three remaining siren. If the situation is dire enough, we can do it ourselves, but at a great cost. We aren’t vampires, so no biting. I mean, eating food, but that’s it. (we do have fangs though)So…for turning someone..a magic spell and the right timing. Next time I go to Atlantis…sorry, no maps, you’ll have to excuse the Current Queen for that. T-shirts don’t exactly look the best when you can’t wear pants because of a tail. So don’t worry about that. And Sam….nope. I’ll look around, but he wasn’t near any water when you last saw him…was he?

        If you want, go to Wattpad.com and look up nasuada02 in the search bar there, and you will find me. I have an Encyclopedia there that has more on Atlantis.

        • The Stormborn

          The soul swap/share: a simple explanation

          There’s more than one soul in my head. Precisely three.
          Ask for one, they may be more helpful. All three are past sireans.
          -Yemaya, or soul number one (not current siren who just wrote that comment above)

          • Hail The Stormborn,

            It must get pretty crowded in there!

            I went to Wattpad and read your Encyclopedia of Paranormal/Supernatural Beings. It was very informative. Thank you for letting me know about it. I hope that you continue your work on it and feel free to post some excerpts of your work here on the relevant pages. SInce you have a section there on werewolves you may be interested in visiting the werewolf site http://yourlupinelife.com

            I am not really sure where Sam was the last time I saw him… in fact come to think of it I am having a hard time remembering when the last time I saw Sam was…

            Seth

            For those interested here is the link to Encyclopedia of Paranormal/Supernatural Beings http://www.wattpad.com/36783631-an-encyclopedia-of-paranormal-supernatrual-beings

            • Urban Squatch

              Need some help looking for him? I’d be glad to help. Did you consider ordering from Amazon Prime? I can get Sam to you in two days with free shipping.

          • Fenrir Ulfangr

            You’ve got most of the info on werewolves right. Although there is a bit more to it, also often healers have some connection to the Druids. I have been to Atlantis, I have seen Akalbeth the drowned. Tethys ruled then I know not the current queen. What news from the deep?

            • Hail Fenrir,

              Thanks for taking a break from the Ragnarok to make this reply to Stormborn. What would you say are the best places to visit in Atlantis? The worst? And how did you get there?

              Seth

  • Tzipporah The Selkie

    Hi, my names Tzipporah. Im part Selkie(sorttalike a seal Meramaid) Part Siren(ima good Siren, although I do get cravings to kill people, on the FullMoon it takes alot of will power to stop my self) and part Water Nymph so to some extent I have Hydrokenetics!

    • Hail Tzipporah The Selkie,

      Welcome to the site. Sorry for the slow reply. Things have been a bit crazy over here at Survival HQ and I have been trying hard to get these new survival videos ready so I have been quite a bit slower on replying to comments than I like to be. Also Graham is busy with university so he is no help at all and I don’t even know where Sam is (Have you seen him?).

      So when you say like a seal mermaid do you mean that sometimes you are human and sometimes you turn into a seal of that you are half human and half seal or that you can sometimes transition between all three? Or is it something else that I missed altogether? Does the moon influence you to transform or shift forms or just alter your mood in a homicidal direction?

      Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

    • Fenrir Ulfangr

      Interesting A water creature, a selkie? this just keeps getting better.

    • Fenrir Ulfangr

      I am Fenrir, also called Nuada and Noios, first lord of the Sea. How may I help you?

  • Auqua

    Hey Seth
    What does it mean when I’m craving water everyday 24 hours

    • Hail Auqua,

      Welcome and sorry for the late reply. I would say this this most likely means one of three things:

      One you are dehydrated and therefor you are thirsty and you should drink more water (and perhaps eat fewer salty snacks).

      Two you may be a mermonster.

      Three you may be the demigod offspring of an ancient sea deity like Poseidon.

      Do you have any other symptoms to report to help narrow it down?

      Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

  • Little angry vampire

    So human you decide to lie to me by telling me I’m a mermaid!
    Respond with something good… 👿

    • Cheshire Cat

      It’s not your fault you lied to his app

    • Not his fault he doesn’t have enough data to give a wholly and totally accurate report.

    • Hail Little angry vampire!

      Welcome to the site. I assume that when you say “human” you are referring to me. In which case you are 99.98% correct.

      And since we have never communicated before that by saying that I lied to you that you have perhaps obtained a diagnosis from the Monstrometer that you believe to be in error.

      So assuming that those assumptions have been accurately assumed by the assumer (that being me) I will tell you that the Monstrometer is the most accurate supernatural diagnostic tool on the surface of the Earth. That said it is not perfect and it does have it’s limitations.

      Firstly it cannot accurately diagnose every supernatural being. You may be some form of aquatic vampire that I am not aware of (or that you are not aware of for that matter).

      Secondly due to the biometric scan component of the Monstrometer it is necessary that both your device and your fingers (or paws or flippers or what have you) to be clean. If you have allowed another being to handle your device at some point (with or without your knowledge) then their genetic material may have contaminated the device and is leading to erroneous readings.

      Thirdly hybrid supernaturals (as opposed to Hybrids which are a particular type of hybrid and are quite rare) are far less uncommon than most beings consider and so it is very possible that you may in fact be a vampire / mermonster hybrid. Possibly you have some mermonster DNA that is either recessive or latent and has not yet shown itself to you in a noticeable fashion. It is possible that many generations in the past that a distant ancestor of yours was in fact a mermonster and that you carry some of their DNA. Far more of the supposedly “human” population of Earth has some supernatural genetic heritage than we have been led to believe. In fact I urge you to scan everyone you know and everyone you meet and you will see that it is quite rare that one of them is actually “human” although they almost all think that they are “human”.

      Fourthly due to the volume of information and processing power required (the supernatural database that it has to deal with behind the scenes is quite enormous!) the Monstrometer can only ask you a maximum of 25 questions at one time due to the inherent limitations of the devices so it may be necessary to scan yourself multiple times and look at the aggregate results rather than individual results. A good practice in supernatural diagnosis is to set an alarm on your device to remind yourself to scan yourself at a certain time everyday then scan your self daily at that time and after one month you will have 30 scans which is far more information to go on. It is also a good idea to keep a journal of strange and interesting events that happen to you.

      Fifthly supernatural diagnosis is not an exact science and so it may be helpful for you to post about your symptoms here on the site and perhaps myself and the other survivors can help you.

      Thanks for visiting the site and commenting. Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

      • Hatter/Janus/guardianR.S.

        The Monstrometer is also a bit faulty in the fact that it does not have a lot of data on anything other than the basic 26 as shown on the Monstrometer monster reports menu along the left hand side of the site which show THE MOST COMMON types of monster known to Seth, graham, & Sam, and in fact you might not even be any of the things you are scanned as being do to the off chance that you are a part of one of the ancient races which unfortunately are not represented on the Monstrometer

      • Well said friend Seth. Now, if you excuse me. I will have to go out, don my viking helmet, grab my sword and shielf from the good old days of being a viking, and wait for Jormungandr on a small motorboat in the middle of the pacific ocean. TO WAR!

      • Fenrir Ulfangr

        Aquatic vampire, that would be Dagon, or one of various Japanese species. They feed on blood but aren’t genetically related to the other vampiric species.

  • Marney

    well a few months back I kept having dreams about water the beach the gulf ect. A women came to me and said I was a Mer with Siren like gifts I just never unlocked it or something. She said she could Teach me their ways but I said I was not too sure. That night unless I was still dreaming I had an orange colored tail maybe with a hint of a golden yellow. Then it was gone. I am not sure what this means if I have ties or something..

  • Adisa fabino

    Seth i cast a spell on my little cousin to be a mermaid do you have any tips to teach her how to control her powers this is her power litst

    1. Flame
    2. Water
    3. Ice.

  • Hey Seth! I’ve been observing your site for a few years now. I’m honestly impressed that a human can show such dedication to the beings of the occult! Anyways, my name is Aubrey. I’m not actually a selkie, just a waterkin, but selkie sounds nice doesn’t it? I wanted to know what the other mermish thought about the shark culling going on in Australia.
    Sincerely,
    Aubrey

  • Rowan

    Yay I finally found my actual monster type I am 99.60 percent merman and I love water sooooo. Much and I can hold my breath for a little while and I love underwater animals soooooooooooooooooo much Seth tll me does strange stuf happen to 99 and 100 percent monsters on and my powers 🙂 SETH ONE SERVIIVLE ROCKS YYYYYAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

  • Assanjin

    Aquarus Femina, better known as the mermaid or merfolk are fish like humanoids. They can communicate with fish, can turn into water at will in all it’s stages, they are rather vanitous, whenever they see their reflections they stare into it for hours on end. Useful survival for dealing with one is giving it a mirror that you carry around. They are beautiful in their own right but beware, most have retractable shark like teeth that they use to drag their prey to the deep and drown it. Though on a rare occasion they fall in love with a human, and the human loves them back, the mix of man and mer gives rise to nymphs, espumados, lake and river guardians, sea serpents and man sharks. They are a cruel hunter, toying with their prey, slowly luring them to the water and then having their way then eat you, cling to your soul when dealing with an angry menfolk for they plan to take the rest. There also exists a rare breed of mermaid in the Carribean, one that lived in the warm waters around my island. Long ago when the Spanish conquistadors came here they found the “mujeres de agua”. They were elusive, beautiful, cunning and refused to be captured. When the conquistadors would drag them ashore they would turn into palm trees that stand to this day to avoid capture.

  • catveena

    *laughs hysterically* Humans really do need to be careful. I’m telling my cousin to read this lol She married a Mermonster. lol

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