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You are here: Home / Monstrometer / Ghosts

Ghosts

October 6, 2009 By Seth 301 Comments

YOU MAY BE DEALING WITH A GHOST

First, the good news. Ghosts are not ALL malevolent, grudge-filled spirits of children who have suffered an untimely abuse-death.

The bad news? Some of them are.

Is your apparition one of those snarly spooks with a vengeful agenda? Or just a harmless haunter with some small unfinished business, like a half-eaten sandwich or a plant that needs watering?

Obviously you don’t need me to tell you how to know the difference. When your bathroom walls bleed and/or your closet growls at you, safe to say it’s a nasty ghosty – no further research required. Do NOT investigate! For the love of dog do NOT go down those stairs or up those stairs or through that door, into those trees or watch the DVD marked DO NOT WATCH. You get the picture.

Problem is, sending your spectral friend back into The Light, does require a bit of research. The key here is SAFE research:

1. If you’re already on speaking terms with your spook, try asking her very politely to spill her story. Then just listen helpfully. Never judge or minimize her eternal pain. Above all this means NOT trying to trump her tale of woe with a better one of your own, ie: no, “Oh that’s nothing, one time MY mom did this…” No matter how boring or convoluted her story gets.

2. If your ghost is less articulate, you will have to work a little harder. Start by researching your building, the builder, its former inhabitants, for example:

  • Google your address for any mysterious news reports.
  • Find the names of former inhabitants and search them.
  • Contact your city or town for info about the property developer.

Talk to your neighbors; it’s possible that your ghost been contacting others. If so don’t be offended. While arguably it makes you a little less special, it could save your life one day. When these neighbors start disappearing, you know it’s Plan B-gone time!

3. Once you have a rough understanding of his ghostly agenda, propose some possible ways you can help him achieve lasting peace. This could be through the proper burial of his remains, the feeding of his beloved dogs, the prosecution of his earthly abuser or just the ultimate destruction of civilization as we know it.

4. When nothing else seems to work, you could be dealing with a ghost who is not vengeful or helpful or busy or reluctant but one who is simply lost. Understand, post-mortem eyesight is far less sensitive to light – an excellent adaptation for those glowy heavenly environs but an impediment to actually finding one’s way there.

This explains why they sometimes get trapped in artificial light sources like TVs and DVDs, computers and photo flashes. To prevent these luminous mistakes, try wrapping all distracting artificial light sources in your home with red caution tape and leave the window open. If your ghost needs better directions than that, try drawing a map with arrows on the wall to clearly indicate the direction and distance to the nearest heavenly light source.

5. If you have one of those ghosts trapped in an old mirror or another shiny old object, you need to follow safe disposal protocol. Call before you dig! If you don’t know a good ghostbuster in your neighbourhood, do your research! Some things have to be incinerated while others call for a midnight burial in a symbolic location. You can’t just put that haunted mirror in the dumpster! 

If The Ghost is You…

First and foremost, don’t despair! Try thinking of yourself as not so much dead, but just corporeally challenged. Sure you may have trouble being seen and not heard, but think of all the perks. You can blink in and out of uncomfortable situations and even hunt down the person(s) who killed you and suck their souls into a secure container for all eternity.

Remember you can always practice incorporeality tricks like running cold water over your hands to re-manifest your old self. Just please, don’t douse yourself in sand or blood. I can’t stress this enough. Sure it’s dramatic, but there are better ways to wake up those phantom limbs. Practice in the mirror until you can manifest your body anywhere, without any external touch cues. Why do you think ghosts are always appearing in mirrors anyway?

One thing to be aware of however, there’s no such thing as a lazy ghost. Unfortunately, unlike vampires or immortals who can choose to loiter for all eternity, your ghosthood comes with a price, normally an important job or mission you will be forced to perform. You may be a banshee soul hunter or a reaper or just a generic grudge keeper but in any case, whatever you are, get ready for a busy and exciting afterlife!

 

 

by Seth Greening - Visit SethOnSurvival.com

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Filed Under: Monstrometer Tagged With: Ghosts, iOS, iPad, iPhone, iPod Touch, Monstrometer

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Comments

  1. Fenrir Ulfangr says

    December 15, 2013 at 10:45 pm

    I have had to linger in spirit form before, the longest time was nearly 1,300 years. Eldar are powerful even in spirit form.

    Reply
  2. Fenrir Ulfangr says

    December 15, 2013 at 10:59 pm

    adroim necrote nin draka dosh’kure magdoru mondarim eolectaros midracorum nakarem doredesh uran draugr dosh riotor mythras aileocte man odosh drai ondaka mi non reosh shuem.

    Reply
  3. Rainstorm says

    January 11, 2014 at 11:22 pm

    Does this sound “ghostly suspicious” to you?
    My school is over 100 years old. It’s very old, as you can see, and very shabby, you’d say, rickety staircases, squeaky doors, it’s old. I thought all this was because it was old, but I had a chat with one of our teachers. Our school used to be the high school (Not a high school, THE high school), and there was a deadly shooting and was closed since, and then opened up again to the students after decades. The nurses office is haunted… I’ve always thought this
    1. The lights never work, always dim, no matter the bulb
    2. You hear from the bathroom… One day I got hit by a locker door and went into the bathroom to look at the bruise and heard, “Help us… Are they gone?” Growling does not scare ghosts, nice or not.
    3. THE NURSE IS A VAMPIRE. SHE REPEATEDLY ASKS PEOPLE FOR BLOOD DONATIONS. NEED I SAY MORE?

    Reply
    • Fenrir Ulfangr says

      January 11, 2014 at 11:31 pm

      Interesting, I’ve heard of things like this but never really seen human ghosts to be very threatening, mostly they just wander around wallowing in self pity.
      Wraiths on the other hand… well if you’re human you really should avoid them. They tend to tear people’s hearts out.

      Reply
      • Vanessa says

        January 11, 2014 at 11:36 pm

        Found you puppy! Gimme some of that red stuff… *hiss*

        Reply
      • Rainstorm says

        January 11, 2014 at 11:38 pm

        Really? What’s a wraith? Vampire? Like that thing down there stalking me down? Well, I just never ever get hurt.. Or ignore the pain. I hate the nurses office and always will.

        Reply
        • The Reaper says

          January 17, 2014 at 6:51 pm

          Wraith = Ghostly spectr, known for magic over death and frost. Sometimes confused with a reaper, but has no corporeal form. And eats souls instead of reaping them for the afterlife.

          Reply
          • Fenrir Ulfangr says

            January 17, 2014 at 11:15 pm

            no they don’t consume the souls the just capture them and bring them to their master, and they can temporarily form corporeal bodies.

            Reply
    • Seth says

      January 17, 2014 at 6:35 pm

      Hail Rainstorm,

      Thanks for checking in with this creepy situation at your school. It’s an unfortunate fact the medical profession tends to attract vampires. Let’s face it, they can handle bloody situations better than most humans and it gives them ready access to a steady supply of the stuff.

      I would keep an eye on that locker. Did you look inside? I sense its a locker with a story to tell…

      Seth

      Reply
      • Rainstorm says

        January 22, 2014 at 1:28 am

        The locker… I’ll describe it. It’s a beaten up looking locker right next to me and it’s supposed to be empty, as no one is using it. It isn’t locked either. I’ll take a look inside when I can… The locker just seems to hate me… If no one is at the locker why is it hitting me? Supernatural stuff at our school

        Reply
        • Bluestar says

          January 28, 2014 at 10:08 am

          My school is at least 131 years old it was a kinder thru eighth grade now a middle school theres a legend that a girl fell down the stairs going down from a room aboce the auditorium and broke her neck and she now haunts that room

          Reply
          • Seth says

            February 8, 2014 at 11:44 pm

            Hail Bluestar,

            Ok so with this creepy haunted school report and the Cannibal Cops story I fear that you might be living in a supernatural vortex. Are you able to report back in with your status? Does time move at the same rate where you live as it does here?

            Keep on keeping on.

            Seth

            Reply
            • Bluestar says

              February 10, 2014 at 9:56 am

              Its completely normal just save the fact this 7th grade year seems to be cursed mostly the girls to fight but it hasnt affected me…..yet maybe its the Indian Girl ghost yes thats what the school knows her as the story goes like this: one day she was wandering around but the hall monitor was coming so she ran up the stairs of the auditorium then when she tried to come down instead fell down and broke her neck

              Reply
              • Bluestar says

                February 10, 2014 at 7:05 pm

                But my friend told me that Cannibal Cops story she said a bunch of criminals did it as a ghastly prank smothered the ribs in BBQ sauce and barbequed it i was DISGUSTED but still no supernatural vortex i just happen to live in a different time zone Pacific specifically.

                Reply
              • Seth says

                March 2, 2014 at 5:23 pm

                Hail Bluestar,

                Yeah that seems pretty normal all right. Well except for the ghosts and an entire grade being cursed! But I guess that kind of thing is pretty common in the Pacific time zone. Must have to do with the San Andreas fault allow easy transit between major Earthly population centres and the underworld.

                An important safety tip, never ever make fun of ghosts. It really makes them mad.

                Seth

                Reply
                • bluestar says

                  March 3, 2014 at 6:16 pm

                  well this is new a rabbit carcass was in the grass of our school two of the teachers believe it was a zombie that tore apart the rabbit and a gopher showed up either dead or asleep more likely dead thanks to the teacher throwing it with a lacrosse stick over the fence

                  Reply
                • Madilynn says

                  May 3, 2015 at 12:56 am

                  Seth… I think it would make anyone mad to be made fun of…

                  Reply
            • Bluestar says

              February 11, 2014 at 6:56 pm

              Ppl make fun of the Indian Girl ghost every year around halloween i think shes out for revenge by twisting the minds of the living seventh grade girls against eachother just this year there has been AT LEAST 6 fights and all of them were girls either the curse doesnt affect werewolf/sasquatches like me or i resist it more easily than others. Like last year they had a student dress up as her and scare the other students this year it was a multipart video explaining her unfortunate and untimely death.

              Reply
        • Seth says

          February 8, 2014 at 11:41 pm

          Hail Rainstorm,

          Did you manage to get a look inside the forsaken locker? If you did I hope that you survived and can return to tell the ghastly tale.

          Seth

          Reply
  4. Bluestar says

    February 10, 2014 at 10:00 am

    My avatar is from Assassin’s creed 3 its the main character’s mother who dies but im not telling you when or how

    Reply
  5. bluestar says

    March 3, 2014 at 6:44 pm

    now about this ive recently developed a phobia of blood that wasnt there before and im definitely not a vamp im a werewolf/squatch. i guess its cause of an injury i suffered when i was in second or third grade an injury that cut open an artery in my thumb it was from a car door half of my shirt was soaked in blood from wrapping my thumb in it

    Reply
    • Bluesky says

      May 31, 2014 at 11:57 pm

      But its relatively minor now the phobia is gone..oh wait its because im a girl thats why im not afraid of blood thiskid at my school actually FAINTED after seeing blood id be like please keep ur blood away from me cause i dont know what germsu got in ur bloodstream

      Reply
  6. Adisa says

    July 14, 2014 at 1:20 am

    Hi seth I fear there is someone In my room because I have expirenced the feeling where I feel a presence and some nights I cant sleep because I feel if a turn around I will see someone there pls help

    Reply
    • Seth says

      August 8, 2014 at 4:59 pm

      Hail Adisa,

      A much belated thank you of your SOS message. If you didn’t already, I would urge you to look for and monitor any chairs in your room. If you don’t have a chair in your room, you might want to place one there. Along with a piece of cherry pie. Monitoring all the sounds and activities of the chair – not to mention the cherry pie – will help you to understand the spirit who might be haunting you.

      Unsure what I mean? You can read more about it here.

      Thanks for keeping on out there, if indeed you are.

      Seth

      Reply
  7. Naturali says

    August 7, 2014 at 9:39 pm

    hey, Seth. I am having trouble knowing what I am. I got mermonster two times, and ghost two times in interrogator. Anyhoo, I have more qualities of a ghost. Can you help?

    Reply
    • Agent RB says

      August 8, 2014 at 2:11 pm

      Do you live on a ship?
      If yes, is this ship almost always covered in fog?
      Do you vaugely remember a large storm in your past but can’t remember what happened after?
      If you’ve answered yes to any of these questions you may be haunting a ghost ship.
      Though, you might also be an elemental spirit of water.
      Only careful research can say for sure. Please report another findings here on the site.

      RB

      Reply
    • Seth says

      August 8, 2014 at 4:55 pm

      Hail Naturali,

      Thanks for you SOS message. I just want to endorse Agent R.B.’s reply here. I really couldn’t have said it better this time. I urge you to read his reply above and report.

      Seth

      Reply
  8. Bljackue says

    August 19, 2014 at 9:29 pm

    Ok, Seth honestly it was like something was trying to stop me from
    Writing this because my phone is crazy glitching out BUT I’m trying to tell you my room is kinda freaky at night by the way I do have a chair it moved once but I doubt that had to do with anything my brother had a night terror where he was screaming the people are touching me. And my sister says she sees a shadowy man floating above me reaching for my face or just standing there but I sometimes see a Victorian plague doctor in my closet if you know what they are. Well, reply soon and I’ll keep on keeping on lol

    Reply
  9. Assanjin says

    September 1, 2014 at 4:32 pm

    Ghost usually kept in their state with a usual punishment of irony to their lives, the thief haunts a jewelry store but cannot steal anything and so on it goes. Basically what brings you comfort in life will be your source of torment in death. Now I do not agree with ghost hunters though, they speak to spirits as if they were objects instead of remembering they were once people, manners apply even when you’re dead, so a nice hello, your welcome, please and thank yous are always appreciated. I have noticed that ghosts and spirits generally do enjoy a nice conversation every once in a while, a how’syour day or are you alright is enough to get them to not cause so much trouble. Hell if you keep that process up they will feel like a guest or a room mate instead of a nuisance or an intruder and you won’t want to get rid of them.

    Stay polite survivors, manners are everything.
    Assanjin

    Reply
  10. Naturali says

    September 13, 2014 at 6:26 pm

    Okay, thank you, both, Seth and Agent RB. That helped a lot. 🙂

    Reply
  11. Naturali says

    September 13, 2014 at 6:29 pm

    (Forgot to say this in other comment) I am not an elemental spirit of water, I seem to be a regular ghost.

    Reply
  12. Madilynn says

    May 2, 2015 at 11:28 pm

    so.. I got ghost and I believe it for like 2 reasons,
    1. My grandmother tells me stories about the fact that when she was once in her bedroom with my dad when he was a baby, she would have dreams about a dark figure leaning over my dad at night, then one day she told my grandfather to take the ouji board out of the closet, cause she’s very superstitious you see, and her dreams stoped.
    2. EVERY SINGLE TIME I GO INTO PUBLIC PEOPLE IGNOR ME even WHEN IM TALKING TO THEM!!!

    So yeah, advice?

    Reply
    • Seth says

      May 4, 2015 at 1:32 pm

      Hail Madlynn,

      Many thanks for your SOS report. Being a ghost and therefore able to pass invisibly in public is a great power as well as a bit of a pain. Try looking at it this way— there are many more accounts of ghosts who learn to achieve corporeality than of beings who succeed in achieving invisibility. Maybe work on the former and be proud of the latter!

      And as always… Keep on keeping on.

      Seth

      Reply
  13. Madilynn says

    May 3, 2015 at 12:42 am

    AAAARGH!!!!! EVEN THIS WEBSITE IS IGNORING EVERYTHING I SAY!!! 👿

    Reply
  14. Madilynn says

    May 3, 2015 at 12:43 am

    Nevermind! Working now! :mrgreen:

    Reply
  15. Madilynn says

    May 3, 2015 at 12:52 am

    do you guys like Apples?? Grapes?? Pancakes?? ❓ 😐 ❓

    Reply
  16. Assanjin says

    May 3, 2015 at 12:15 pm

    I can’t resist fruit, apples are my favorites next to blueberries. Grapes as well. Have you ever tried a grape flavored pancake?

    Reply
    • Madilynn says

      May 3, 2015 at 6:44 pm

      No… BUT IT SOUNDS GOOD!! Oh, wait this conversation is a little off topic…

      Reply
      • Assanjin says

        May 3, 2015 at 9:44 pm

        I cannot ignore you. Nor do I wish to. No spirit or demon in existence could hide you from my eyes. Mainly because my appetite makes me compensate in my senses to search for food. If u are feeling ignored in public try smacking the person you want to notice you. That will definitely get their attention.

        Reply
  17. Madilynn says

    May 4, 2015 at 7:17 pm

    Good idea!! :mrgreen:

    Reply
  18. catveena says

    June 22, 2015 at 2:14 am

    Ghosts are tricky tricky tricky lol

    Reply
  19. Fenrir Iceborn says

    October 8, 2015 at 12:04 am

    Reaper I know you can see this. If you’re the Pale rider now; where are the other horsemen? Why have no others appeared?

    Reply
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