(SOS/ASAP/WTF) Sunday, May 27th Hackensack, New Jersey: Just one day after the terrifying zombie/cannibal case in Miami, this terrifying report from supernatural reporter & survivor Mr. Mutt:
A baffling case of self-mutilation is leaving people wondering: Zombie, Demon or Alien? You be the judge.
Police were called to the home […]
(SOS/ASAP/WTF) Miami, Florida – Cannibals say they are “deeply offended” today over Interweb buzz re: the so-called “Naked Cannibal”, a 31 year-old man named Rudy Eugene who was shot yesterday munching on another man’s face in broad daylight.
You are probably familiar with the facts. A police officer caught Mr. Eugene snacking on […]
Disturbing reports this week from survivors Chris and Jane: ZOMBIE GNOMES!
When Chris and Jane first bought their home in a quiet American suburb, they immediately noticed the large number and strange behavior of the local garden gnomes.
“They looked like cute little statues at first, but they never seemed to be in […]
An Icelandic member of parliament who claims some beautiful elves saved his life, is now wanted for elfnapping in the third degree by Álfaskólinn, the Icelandic School for Elves.
Árni Johnsen says his life was saved by an elf stone in 2010, when a terrible accident completely destroyed his car but left him […]
An SOS 99.98% True Story: An alien entrepreneur named Greg W. Nemitz is angry this week as NASA refuses to pay an overdue parking ticket for landing on his asteroid in 2001.
Alien Homesteader Gregory Nemitz Wants Nasa to Pay Parking
Gregory W. Nemitz claims that NASA parked a probe on his homestead, a […]
Grisly news from Seoul, South Korea this week. A load of pills advertised as healthy food supplements turned out to be capsules for cannibals.
Read on for the good news and the bad news about cannibal pills. Another SOS true story, 99.98% guaranteed.
Capsules for Cannibals Discovered in Seoul South Korea
Here’s the first clue to the Survivor of the Month for the Dragon Moon, 2012:
Do you recognize this Survivor of the Month?
1. Είμαι με κανένα τρόπο αυτοκτονίας, αλλά να κάνω έντονα την επιθυμία να είναι με την αγάπη μου και πάλι.
2. Is a vegetarian who loves meat ice cream.
3. Has braces in human form […]
Here are the first clues to our first SOS Hall of Fame inductee, meaning from the last year:
Coming Soon: Super Moon Survivors
01010011 01110101 01110010 01110110 01101001 01110110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01001101 01101111 01101110 01110100 01101000 00100000 01010000 00110101 01010100 00110101 01010010
2. On first […]
May 03-2012: It’s here: Supermoon Saturday. The Dragon Moon rises, bringing with it Draconian events.
As most survivors here know, a “supermoon” occurs when the moon’s perigee, that is when it swings closest to the earth, coincides with a full or new moon phase, resulting in a full moon that is about […]